Talk:Larry Geraty

My thoughts

I think the lead needs to be more summarizing of the article's information. I think the tone needs working on - make it less repetitive and a little more neutral. Add more commentary about the events.Jasper Deng (talk) 03:30, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

What specific issues do you see with NPOV? BelloWello (talk) 03:54, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

I mean, the article is just basically a resume in tone. I'm a very strict judge on article tone, fyi.Jasper Deng (talk) 03:55, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

I agree, but isn't that generally what biographical articles are? I guess my question wasn't very easy to answer, what specific improvements do you suggest? (Also, neither I nor anyone would object to your editing the article.) BelloWello (talk) 03:57, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

For example, space out the achievements of this person a little more, insert more commentary.Jasper Deng (talk) 04:01, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

I will do my best to do so. BelloWello (talk) 04:35, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

The article is absolutely ready for the mainspace. It doesn't have to be perfect before it goes live, and this is already a pretty decent article. I don't see any significant NPOV issues, though I agree with what I think Jasper is getting at in that the prose is a little dry. However, that is pretty typical in biographical articles, especially in the beginning when you are focusing on covering the important facts. I think you ought to take this live and let the wiki process do its thing.--Kubigula (talk) 04:08, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

Thanks for the affirmation Kubigula. I've gone ahead and moved it and nominated it for a DYK. BelloWello (talk) 04:35, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Larry Geraty/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Eisfbnore ^talk 10:24, 12 May 2011 (UTC)

• State in the lead where the La Sierra University is.

• The lead is generally a bit short, please extend it with one sentence or two.

• The two last sentences in the lead are a bit peacocky, please state what fields he's been a professor in, and who have recognized him as an "active community leader". Also, I'm not quite sure if the line In addition to his role at La Sierra University… is really useful.

• There is a bit of close paraphrasing in the section Family and early life. Compare With his family, he lived in China, Burma, Hong Kong, Lebanon, England, Germany, France, Israel, California, Maryland, Michigan and Massachusetts. with the source text As a child he traveled with his missionary family who lived and worked in China, Burma, Hong Kong, Lebanon, England, Germany, France, Israel, California, Maryland, Michigan and Massachusetts. Also note that the sentence jumps from listing contries to listing US states.

• The last sentence in the same section is a one-liner, which are usually not acceptable. Please split the first para immidiatly after His father, T.S. Geraty, worked as an educator and missionary and merge it with the one-liner.

• In the late 1950s, not in the late 50's.

• He then went to Pacific Union College for his undergraduate degree in theology, which he received in 1962 – When? Perhaps I am being unkind—as I can read that from the previous section—, but please state it in the sentence, since it's in a new section.

• Be consistent in whether you include commas after "By/From/In/On [year]".

• "received" is more formal and encyclopedic than "got".

• "Awards and Recognition" is not a proper noun (the section header)

• Is the above section list to be completed? If it is completed, then remove the {{expand list}} note from below the header.

• Use endashes to separate years. (2002–2005, not 2002-2005 for example)

• "Authored Works" is not a proper noun. Perhaps rename the section to "Publications"?

• Book titles should be in italics.

• Is it really necessary to include page numbers/page count and Hardcover/Paperback information in the list of works?

• There is to much hidden text in the section Awards.

• Dr. Geraty was President of the now defunct… – "President" is in this context not a proper noun, and should thus be decapitalized.

Citation comments

• Be consistent in whether you use templates for the citations.

• Citations like "SDA Yearbook, 1967, pp. 14, 15, 394" and "1977 Yearbook, p. 58" are not complete. Please give them more information, like editor, publisher, etc.

• Don't use bare URLs for the citations

• The external links section is a linkfarm. If I'd have a guess, I'd say that most, if not all of the ext links could be used as citations. IIRC, PDF's are also inappropriate as external links.

• For accessibility reasons, it should be marked somehow that the PDF urls are, well, PDFs. You can do that by adding |format=PDF to the citations formatted with templates and with {{PDFlink}} for those written out by hand (the external links for example).

Placing on hold. --Eisfbnore ^talk 10:24, 12 May 2011 (UTC)

Thank you, Eisfbnore for the review. I believe I have taken care of the main text issues, if you don't mind taking a look? We'll deal with the citations in a bit. bW 19:05, 12 May 2011 (UTC)

Please take another look. :) I think that got most of what is outlined above. bW 02:20, 13 May 2011 (UTC)

Yes, most of the issues i've raised have been fix, but you'll have to fix all of them in order to make this a GA. I've striken the comments that have been resolved, so that you easily can see which are left. Thanks for the quick action and response. Eisfbnore ^talk 07:45, 13 May 2011 (UTC)

So, just to confirm: the issue is with citation nine, correct? Citation two also does not use a template, but it would be hard to put that neatly into a template (unless you have suggestions for that?)bW 08:49, 13 May 2011 (UTC)

Yes, and also # 13 and # 26. I took the liberty to remove the two non-PDF urls from ref 2 (they were dead) and format the entire citation with {{cite web}}. Maybe that was wrong (I was lingering between using {{cite web}} and {{cite journal}}), so feel free to amend the citation in any way you would feel appropriate. Also, remember my bulleted comment #11. Eisfbnore ^talk 10:42, 13 May 2011 (UTC)

Everything is done except fixing citation nine. I can't open the format of file its in. Hopefully Donald will come online and can maybe take care of it, unless you can open the djvu file? bW 11:04, 13 May 2011 (UTC)

No, I can't open the file on my laptop. Perhaps I'll try at my home computer later on. Also, remember to add retrieval dates for online sources and standardize upon one date format style. Currently, some publication/retrival dates use DD-MM-YYYY, some MM-DD-YYYY, some are written in full and some are not. Eisfbnore ^talk 11:24, 13 May 2011 (UTC)

I found a PDF version. I believe we are all set now. :) bW 20:58, 14 May 2011 (UTC)

Thanks. Also have a look at my comment about date format standardization in the previous post. Cheers. --Eisfbnore ^talk 08:25, 15 May 2011 (UTC)

 Done bW 17:48, 15 May 2011 (UTC)

Copyedit May 2011

Hi

During the copyedit a few things came to light which may need attention:

Andrews University Seminary

• "...begin internship training in the summer of 1963. He continued his internship at the seminary in the fall of 1962." - odd, he could not have continued it before he started it.

Archaeologist

• There is a lot of material hidden in this section, is there a reason for this?

Chaosdruid (talk) 14:33, 17 May 2011 (UTC)

Hi Chaosdruid, I think I have resolved both concerns you have raised. DonaldRichardSands (talk) 18:42, 17 May 2011 (UTC)

A slight concern

It's a bit surprised for me that this article is a GA. IMHO it look like an advert rather than a NPOV biography. Also, I've added that he's currently the chairman of Chemax Education Foundation, which is being shown on its website.--Jsjsjs1111 (talk) 22:34, 10 October 2011 (UTC)

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GA Reassessment

Larry Geraty

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch • Watch article reassessment page • Most recent review

Result: Delisted due to failing GA criterion 2. ~~ AirshipJungleman29 (talk) 23:56, 25 October 2023 (UTC)

I'm responding to the request made by User:Catfurball back in September.[1] The current version has unsourced material and sources that can't be traced back, either because the reference information is entirely wrong or something else. This is true for Adventist Review, which the freely available archives do not support by the date, volume, title, or issue listed, so there are issues with the referencing. Viriditas (talk) 01:02, 12 October 2023 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.