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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/SS Mauna Loa

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by User:SandyGeorgia 21:02, 17 November 2008 [1].

SS Mauna Loa

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Nominator(s): Bellhalla (talk)

I believe that this article meets the featured article requirements. It has passed a (rather strange) GA review, a peer review, and, most recently, an A-Class review. — Bellhalla (talk) 00:05, 6 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments -

  • What makes http://www.miramarshipindex.org.nz/ a reliable source? (I'm leaning reliable but more information would be good.)
    • Rodger Haworth, the website's author/publisher, is the coauthor of several of the Starke/Schell ship registers published by the World Ship Society (WSS page describing the Starke/Schell publications). FWIW, the newer editions seem to be only on CD, but the original registers appeared in print form, like Register of Merchant Ships by Tony Starke, Klaus Wernick, and William A. Schell, published in 1980 by A.J.Starke of Lyndoch, S.A. (OCLC 221755528). — Bellhalla (talk) 15:22, 6 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Otherwise, sources look okay, links checked out with the link checker tool. Ealdgyth - Talk 12:55, 6 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I'll leave this one out for other reviewers to decide for themselves, although I lean reliable. Ealdgyth - Talk 15:12, 10 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
This seems reliable to me, too. Awadewit (talk) 21:04, 11 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Images have descriptions and verifiable licenses. Awadewit (talk) 02:13, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  • Support Comments
  • I know it's project standards, but is there nothing better to call the ship than "she"? It sounds more like something a drunken sailor would say than what an encyclopedia would write.
  • The lead reads like a list disguised as prose; many of the ideas begin with "In X year", or something similar.
    • Will take a look at it and see about rewording some.
      • OK, I tweaked the lead so there weren't so many "In x year…" phrases. Does the revised version flow better? — Bellhalla (talk) 16:29, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Little information on the first year's of West Conob's career is found in sources. - Should that be "years"?
    • D'oh! Fixed it.
  • In October 1927, the Los Angeles Times reported on the impending sale of West Conob and 18 other Swayne & Holt ships to a San Francisco financier[14] - Needs a full stop.
    • Fixed
  • Mauna Loa continued on the Hawaii – California – Philadelphia/New York service, occasionally making extra voyages from Los Angeles to Honolulu when dictated by cargo bookings. - These en dashes should be unspaced.
    • I wasn't sure since the last item was "Philadelphia/New York" (with an internal space), but I have made them unspaced en-dashes.
  • Mauna Loa's movements over the next three months are not found in sources, but by mid-February 1942, she had made her way to Darwin, Northern Territory, Australia. - "Are not found in sources" → "are unknown".
    • Changed.
  • The convoy was soon spotted by a Japanese Kawanishi H6K "Mavis" four-engined flying boat that tailed the convoy at 10,000 feet (3,000 m). - "Soon" is redundant.
    • Good point, and removed.
  • What cites the information in the Notes section?
    • Some of them have internal cites already, but the ones that don't should be covered by the same reference that covers that section of the prose. For example, [Note 1], that gives more details about the Genoa route, is from reference [3], which immediately precedes it in the text. I can duplicate the reference information in the Notes if it's not clear enough.

Good work overall. –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 03:40, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the review and your comments. I've interspersed my replies above. — Bellhalla (talk) 06:06, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Leaning towards support I don't know much about ships, but this seemed like a comprehensive article to me: a description of the ship itself and an outline of its history and engagements. I did a little bit of copyediting while I was reading and while more wouldn't come amiss, I think the prose in this article is generally quite good. It is hard to make the section on the cargo history flow well - "and then the ship hauled more pineapple". :) My concerns are with the sources - a few of the web sources look a little sketchy to me, but that could be because I am unfamiliar with them:

  • This source seems to be compiled by Tim Colton - what makes him trustworthy under WP:SPS?
    • I believe that Mr. Colton would be considered an expert in the field of shipbuilding. Shipbuildinghistory.com is a fork off his main website, Coltoncompany.com. A quick worldcat.org search brings up 3 books + 4 articles on the shipbuilding industry and its history authored or co-authoered by Mr. Colton. — Bellhalla (talk) 02:09, 12 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • This source, although it claims to have an editorial staff, just seems to be a collection of people interested in flags.
    • I've posted an inquiry at WP:RSN — Bellhalla (talk) 02:09, 12 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      • Though the response at RSN was that FOTW is "semi-reliable", I've removed one discursive note attributed to the website and replaced the other reference with a contemporary article from The New York Times. — Bellhalla (talk) 20:26, 13 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • This does not look like a reliable site (who wrote it? who checked its contents?). - I think we need a more reliable source for this statement: After the war, a Japanese salvage firm was awarded the contract for salvaging the remains of Mauna Loa and the other wrecks in the harbor, but were prohibited from removing any of the American-owned cargo still remaining.
    • Fair enough. I'll remove it for now and look for other another source. — Bellhalla (talk) 02:09, 12 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

After these source issues are cleared up, I look forward to supporting the article. Awadewit (talk) 21:04, 11 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  • Support - A very clear article and an interesting story. I made a couple little copy editing changes (Hope they're ok). Some might criticize that there are words wikilinked more than once, but I appreciated it. One question, what does a "developed area" mean in relation to a propeller? —Mattisse (Talk) 22:54, 15 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • I'm not exactly sure but I think "developed area" is the actual surface area of a propeller that generates thrust. I would love to wikilink it, but I'm not sure where I would link it. There are hints at the term in propeller, but that article doesn't really explain it. — Bellhalla (talk) 23:00, 16 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      • I've added a discursive note (+ ref) explaining "developed area" (which is the combined surface area of all the blades of a propeller). — Bellhalla (talk) 12:20, 17 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for that. —Mattisse (Talk) 21:11, 17 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Closing note: This candidate has been promoted, but there may be a delay in bot processing of the close. Please see WP:FAC/ar, and leave the {{FAC}} template in place on the talk page until the bot goes through. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 21:06, 17 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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