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Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of Slipknot band members

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was promoted by User:The Rambling Man 07:15, 1 August 2008 [1].

List of Slipknot band members edit

I am nominating the for featured list status because I believe it's comprehensive in it's coverage and is well sourced and accurate and I believe it meets all the criteria of a featured list. REZTER TALK ø 06:32, 16 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  • Comment Looks great to me. But my main concern is with the prose. Most of it needs a thorough copyedit for misspellings, grammar, and run-on sentences. I did a quick one myself in the lead, but it still needs alot of work throughout. Also, what do the black lines in the timeline denote? I think they need a legend. Drewcifer (talk) 07:53, 16 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
They are to represent the bands' releases, they should be labelled but the legend isn't showing it and I'm not sure why, maybe because there are too many labels to fit in the small image. REZTER TALK ø 13:59, 16 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
After some experimenting I think the best thing to do is to add another image for the legend, my proposal is at my sandbox. If you think this is OK I will add it. REZTER TALK ø 18:52, 16 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Also, if somebody can highlight the problems you mention with the prose then we can fix them. REZTER TALK ø 18:20, 16 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I like what I see in your sandbox, go for it! Like a said above, the prose needs a copyedit based on spelling (it's vs its for example), grammar, and run on sentences. I'd highly recommend asking someone uninvolved to help you out, since a pair of fresh eyes will do the list alot of good. Also, I just realized that the list should be renamed to "List of Slipknot members" per list naming conventions. Drewcifer (talk) 20:25, 17 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
OK I have added the additional timeline legend. Is there anywhere specifically I can request for help with the copyeditting? And regarding the moving of the page, I'm OK with it, I'm just unsure of how we would do that. REZTER TALK ø 20:42, 17 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Move the page by hitting the Move button at the top of the page, next to History :) Gary King (talk) 04:19, 22 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Yeah it was done five days ago by Drewcifer. REZTER TALK ø 04:23, 22 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
The language is much better, but with a quick search I found a few typos and a little bit of poor grammar. Unfortunately I don't have time to help long-term, so I'll regretfully abstain. Good luck though. Drewcifer (talk) 17:45, 29 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • I'd like to see the second paragraph in the lead split up as it's pretty ginormous.
  • "band, his replacement " needs either a semicolon or a conjunction
  • "Shortly after this" – either "Shortly after" or "Shortly after this change"
  • "Jones fitted the" – "Jones fit the"
  • "couldn't provide" – "could not provide"
  • I definitely agree with Drewcifer that the article needs a thorough copyedit, per what I found above. The contraction was particularly troubling as those are easy to find and resolve.

Gary King (talk) 04:24, 22 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  • All done. I have made several other revisions to the intro, but any other comments are welcome. Blackngold29 04:54, 22 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Resolved comments from Matthewedwards (talk • contribs • email) 19:29, 27 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • How is the list of members ordered? It's not by number (which is how it is in the template at the bottom of the page), it's not alphabetically, and it's not by the year they became a band member
    • They are ordered as such; vocalist, guitarists, bassist, drummer, additional percussion, electronics. They can obviously be reordered if you think there's a more adequate order. REZTER TALK ø 10:10, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Prose issues:
    • "Alongside Anders Colsefini, Donnie Steele, Josh Brainard, Paul Gray and Shawn Crahan, Joey Jordison was a member of the original band formed in 1995 as a drummer." They were all drummers?
      • For every one of the original members should it list what each of them did? REZTER TALK ø 10:10, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • No, but the use of "alongside" with a list of people infers that they were all drummers. Each of the sentences that do this should be re-written for clarity. It's fine to say that he's a drummer, but not to have people think that they're all drummers. Matthewedwards (talk • contribs • email) 15:51, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
          • I have removed all of the "as a (instrument)", it's mentioned just above there and is kind of unnecessary. REZTER TALK ø 17:03, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • "Alongside Anders Colsefini, Donnie Steele, Josh Brainard, Joey Jordison and Paul Gray, Shawn Crahan was a member of the original band formed in 1995 as a percussionist and backup vocalist." They were all percussionists and backup vocalists?
    • "Alongside Anders Colsefini, Donnie Steele, Josh Brainard, Joey Jordison and Shawn Crahan, Paul Gray was a member of the original band formed in 1995 as a bass guitarist and backup vocalist." They were all bass guitarists?
    • "He replaced the spot left on guitar" he should use some furniture polish on that
    • "Taylor was recruited from fellow local band Stone Sour in 1997, the band's music required more melodic singing" should be a semi-colon, I think, and then "the band's" is confusing - which band do you refer to?
    • "...vocalist Anders Colsefini struggled to accomplish." I understand that current members come before previous members, so Colsefini won't be listed before Taylor, so how about a Self link
      • I'm not sure a self link is appropriate, the changes were mentioned chronologically in the intro and the prose for each member is just an extension of that information. This is a list not an article. REZTER TALK ø 10:10, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • "Shortly after Jones entered the band as a guitarist" -- who is Jones? Self link again, I think. And why give his surname only, whereas in the previous entry, you give Anders Colsefini's full name
      • I gave his full name but not a self link. REZTER TALK ø 10:10, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • "He replaced the spot left on guitar since Brainard's departure" Who?
    • "Alongside Anders Colsefini, Josh Brainard, Joey Jordison, Paul Gray and Shawn Crahan, Donnie Steele was a member of the original band formed in 1995 as a guitarist." Were they all guitarists?
    • "Alongside Donnie Steele, Josh Brainard, Joey Jordison, Paul Gray and Shawn Crahan, Anders Colsefini was a member of the original band formed in 1995 as lead vocalist and percussionist." Were they all etc etc?
Matthewedwards (talk • contribs • email) 09:17, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • You should explain what the numbers mean. I think someone unfamiliar with the band won't know that each member is given a number, and without mentioning it in the article, it looks a bit WP:OR
    • It is explaiend in the main Slipknot article, does this list really need it? I mean what do you propose, that theres a new section of prose about them? A mention in the lead? REZTER TALK ø 10:10, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comments
    • Image in the lead is really dark, no better ones available?
    • "metal band " in lead probably should be linked to the relevant genre otherwise you could be referring to a wedding ring.
      • Done
    • "which peaked and has since remained at nine members" doesn't make sense.
      • Reworded
    • Ought to link "sampler" and "turntablist" really since they're quite specialist terms.
      • Done
    • "the band realized" collective consciousness? Reword.
      • Done. I double checked and it was Joey Jordison who came up with the idea... reworded. REZTER TALK ø 11:39, 29 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • "Jones fit the position as " fitted?
      • Gary King disagrees above
    • "the band decided a new vocalist was needed" again, collective consciousness working?
    • "could not provide vocal melody which the band considered integral to the material they were writing. " needs reference.
    • "Wanting to retain their percussive edge, Greg Welts joined the band as Colsefini's replacement." how does the second clause logically follow the first here? It's not clear.
      • They wanted to remain strong in the percussion area, so they replaced the drummer who left.
    • "In 1998, Welts became the only member who was asked to leave " try "who has been asked to leave"...
      • Done
    • "have the vocalists trade-off, " jargon.
      • Done
    • "Jim Root" then you call him "James Root" - be consistent.
      • Done - Keeping it "Jim"
    • "Mick Thomson was brought ..." just "Thomson was brought ..." is fine - this goes for all other entries, no need to repeat the first name.
      • Done
    • What particular order are the members in? It's not alpahebtical, not chronlogical, not numerical - is it just random?
      • As Rezter said above: "They are ordered as such; vocalist, guitarists, bassist, drummer, additional percussion, electronics. They can obviously be reordered if you think there's a more adequate order."
    • "head butted " needs to be hyphenated.
      • Done
    • "1997-1998 " needs en-dash.
      • Done
    • "realised " if this is US-English then surely it should be "realized"?
      • Done
    • "Alongside Anders Colsefini, Josh Brainard, Joey Jordison, Paul Gray and Shawn Crahan..." boring repeat of the line-up time-after-time. Just say "Member of original line-up" (or similar).
    • Page ranges need en-dash.
      • I'm unclear what you mean by this, can you elaborate? REZTER TALK ø 11:51, 29 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • Done Like the references with page x–y. Blackngold29 16:14, 29 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • A lot more work to do, 3 days overdue and currently no supports. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:14, 29 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Maybe no supports, but all comments addressed and each reviewer has been notified on their talk page, that's all we can do. Drewcifer appears to be on a Wikibreak, but I have just left a quick reminder to him, Gary King, and Matthewedwards. Blackngold29 03:15, 1 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Support Much improvement since the nomination opened. All my concerns have been resolved, and it meets the criteria. Matthewedwards (talk • contribs • email) 05:13, 1 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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