Wikipedia

Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of New Jersey County Colleges/archive1

< Wikipedia:Featured list candidates‎ | List of New Jersey County Colleges
The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was promoted by Matthewedwards 22:48, 16 May 2009 [1].

List of New Jersey County Colleges

edit
Nominator(s): MBisanz talk
Toolbox

I am nominating this for featured list because it seems like a well documented topic that I have expanded and has gone through Peer Review. I added all the aerial images and created a template to link all the list items together. MBisanz talk 22:38, 30 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]

The writing is pretty good, except for one aspect: punctuation (mostly a matter of unnecessary commas; one comma splice):

The New Jersey County Colleges is a system of 19 public community colleges, encompassing over 60 campuses, in the state of New Jersey.[1][2] Most of the colleges were created by the state during the 1960s, to provide access to higher education to New Jersey residents. As of 2009, there are 19 county colleges statewide, this reflects the fact that each college serves one of New Jersey's 21 counties, except for Atlantic Cape Community College and Raritan Valley Community College, each of which serves two counties.

This would be smoother to read:

The New Jersey County Colleges is a system of 19 public community colleges, encompassing more than 60 campuses in the state of New Jersey.[1][2] Most of the colleges were created by the state during the 1960s to provide access to higher education to New Jersey residents. As of 2009, there are 19 county colleges statewide; this reflects the fact that each college serves one of New Jersey's 21 counties, except for Atlantic Cape Community College and Raritan Valley Community College, each of which serves two counties.

Comma after "female" would be good. "more than 350,000". Before "the oldest", you might consider a colon or a period, and then a semicolon before "It". Makes the relationships between the statements more logical, perhaps. MoS says no hyphen after "-ly", with good reason.

Have you thought of not piping "1964" so readers know there's something interesting behind what looks like a plain year link? It might work in such large boxes, just the top one (unless you don't like the idea of sorting via other columns, which would render it in the middle). Tony (talk) 17:22, 1 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Made the grammar and style corrections (I think). I tried doing the founding column a bunch of different ways, and not piping it make the column huge with lots of extra words in comparison to the other columns. Also, unless I un-pipe all of the rows, it breaks the sorting feature. I think I'd rather just leave it the way it is now with the note Dabomb suggested to keep the balance among all the rows. Thanks for the corrections. MBisanz talk 18:04, 1 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments from Dabomb87 (talk · contribs)

  • "in the state of New Jersey." I'd prefer "U.S. state".
  • "campuses ranging in size"-->campuses that range in size
  • "Not all of the county colleges were founded by the State of New Jersey," Comma should be a semicolon. Dabomb87 (talk) 23:26, 7 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Sources look good. Dabomb87 (talk) 23:26, 7 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Note Nominator is on WikiBreak until June 1. Dabomb87 (talk) 00:34, 8 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

I'd be happy to take over in the meantime. –Juliancolton | Talk 00:45, 8 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comment - There are a number of unreferenced sentences throughout the lead section. Geraldk (talk) 02:12, 14 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Could you provide examples, please? Dabomb87 (talk) 02:13, 14 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Looking back it's really only two sentences...
  • The latter part of this: 'Most of the colleges were created by the state during the 1960s to provide access to higher education to New Jersey residents.'
Yeah, you're right, it's a little nitpicky. It's just that the wording makes it sound like that is the official reason why it was created. Don't know if there's a way to reword to avoid that reading of it, deletion of the clause is fine too - doesn't seem to add much factually to the article. Geraldk (talk) 03:11, 14 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • And all of this: 'In 2003, the state further established the Community College Consortium for Workforce and Economic Development as a single point of contact for employers looking for skilled workers in New Jersey.' Geraldk (talk) 02:20, 14 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support now. Well done. Geraldk (talk) 12:52, 16 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Images

I've just been through and reviewed all of these. All great, with two comments:

  • File:Raritan Valley CC-NJ.jpg - the source listed is currently incorrect (I have no concerns about this not being PD, as it is exactly like the others, but it would be nice to have the correct URL in the source)
  • A very minor thing, but I'm just commenting for consistency. The majority of the images have the top side pointing north, with the exception of File:Salem CC-NJ.jpg and File:Middlesex County CC-NJ.jpg. Is there any reason these are rotated, it just seems slightly odd.

Rambo's Revenge (talk) 21:58, 14 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Source fixed. I rotated Salem because it is so oblong that it would make the table look odd, Middlesex is less oblong, but I still felt it looked better rotated. MBisanz talk 03:57, 15 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Featured_list_candidates/List_of_New_Jersey_County_Colleges/archive1&oldid=1143899134"