Template:Did you know nominations/W. G. Hardy

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Yoninah (talk) 19:48, 30 January 2020 (UTC)

W. G. Hardy

5x expanded by Flibirigit (talk). Self-nominated at 04:52, 22 January 2020 (UTC).

Symbol question.svg Substantial bio on plenty of good sources, few offline sources accepted AGF, no copyvio obvious. - Article: consider this pre-GA comments, they are not the way of approving: The image captions are too long; they should not tell the same story once more. I tried trimming a few at the end, for a model. No article image caption should have (pictured), - that's only for hooks; instead, the caption should say what is pictured, and the text how that connects. - The lead is too long, - that's a rare complaint. It should be a summary, not repeating full sentences from below. That he gave 250 lectures is no lead material, for example. - The infobox has too much detail, another rare complaint. We don't need book titles there, nor all these organzations. Take a few, and grant them plainlist instead of flatlist, - or I won't read it ;) - Another minor thing: please check refs for numeric order. After making those changes, try GAN. - Now we get to the hooks, and after having read the article I found every single one disappointing. "Canadian professor and writer" is too general for someone who lectured the Classics for decades and was influential in Canadian ice hockey, so please don't waste characters on it. Striking those that are way too harmless. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:14, 22 January 2020 (UTC)
I have no desire to go through a good article nomination. I feel I have written the article to conform to all DYK policies. Please suggest what you think is hooky, and what is a better way to describe Hardy instead of "Canadian professor and writer". Flibirigit (talk) 22:02, 22 January 2020 (UTC)
Gerda Arendt, How about the following hooks? HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk) 22:39, 22 January 2020 (UTC)
ALT7:... as the first vice-president of the Canadian Amateur Hockey Association, W. G. Hardy helped boost registration by 4,500 players over three years? Playoff Successes May Loft Financial Reserve To $60,000"
ALT8:... that former president of the Canadian Authors Association, W. G. Hardy, helped the University of Alberta build their first ice rink?Dr. W. George Hardy (Builder)
ALT9:... that Canadian professor, writer, and ice hockey administrator, W. G. Hardy, helped redefine the word amateur in sports?Should We Revise Our Amateur Laws?
If I word a hook, you need yet a different person to approve it, - not a good idea when time is running. You don't have to describe Hardy at all, - better say what he did. How is this I approve three, but am still open for new suggestions?
Symbol voting keep.svg --Gerda Arendt (talk) 22:51, 22 January 2020 (UTC)