Meet the Spartans
Meet the Spartans is a 2008 American parody film written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. The film is mainly a parody of the 2007 film 300, although it also references many other films, TV shows, people and pop cultural events of the time, in a manner similar to previous films that Friedberg and Seltzer had been involved in such as Scary Movie, Date Movie and Epic Movie. The film stars Sean Maguire, Carmen Electra and Kevin Sorbo.
|Meet the Spartans|
Theatrical release poster
|Directed by||Thomas Abraham VB|
|Music by||Christopher Lennertz|
|Edited by||Peck Prior|
|Distributed by||20th Century Fox|
|Box office||$84.6 million|
Meet the Spartans opened at No. 1 in the United States. Despite receiving extremely negative reviews, it was a box-office success, grossing $84 million on a budget of $30 million.
A Spartan elder inspects three babies. The first, an ugly, talking baby ogre (Shrek the Third), is abandoned to die for its deformity; while the second, who is Vietnamese, is adopted by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. The third, Leonidas, is accepted as a Spartan for his already-present muscular physique and prepared for kinghood through brutal training. An adult Leonidas (Sean Maguire) is cast out into the wild, survives the harsh winter, and hunts down a gangsta penguin (Happy Feet). Returning a king for his inauguration wearing a penguin skin hat, Leonidas sees Margo (Carmen Electra) erotically dancing and asks her to marry him, to which she responds by giving him the combination to her armor-plated chastity belt.
Years later, Leonidas is training his son when Captain (Kevin Sorbo) informs him that a Persian messenger has arrived. Accompanied by the Spartan politician Traitoro, the messenger presents Xerxes' demands for Sparta's submission. After growing angry with both the messenger's disrespect and finding him making out with his wife, Leonidas kicks him into a pit. Despite Traitoro's advice that the messenger's guards are now needed to convey the actual message, Leonidas kicks them in as well, along with several other people he simply dislikes, such as Britney Spears (Nicole Parker), Ryan Seacrest, and the American Idol judges. Resolving to face the Persians, Leonidas visits the prophets and gives them medicines such as Neutrogena as their price for their consultation. They advise him that he should consult the Oracle for any advice. The Oracle, Ugly Betty (Crista Flanagan), reveals that Leonidas will die should he go to war.
After reaching a decision while spending the night with his wife, Leonidas meets the soldiers assembled for his departure to Thermopylae, and finds that only thirteen were accepted in the army due to stringent requirements. Among them are Captain, his son Sonio, and a slightly unfit Spartan named Dilio. Once at the Hot Gates, they encounter a deformed Paris Hilton (Parker), who tells Leonidas and the Captain about a secret goat path above the Hot Gates that Xerxes could use to outflank the Spartans. When she asks to be made a Spartan soldier, Leonidas rejects her as unqualified due to her inability to use a spear correctly. Leonidas and his platoon soon face off with Xerxes' messenger and his Immortals, beating them in a dance contest before driving them off a cliff. Xerxes (Ken Davitian), impressed, personally approaches Leonidas and attempts to bribe him with a trip to the Palms Hotel and Casino. Leonidas declines, and the Spartans face the Persian army in a "Yo Momma" fight, which the Spartans win, but Dilio has his eyes scratched out and wanders away.
Hilton decides to betray the Spartans and reveals the location of the goat path to Xerxes in return for various gifts and for having her deformed hump removed. Xerxes meets the twelve remaining Spartans and the war begins. Meanwhile, back in Sparta, Queen Margo has several confrontations with Traitoro, as he is the vital vote in sending more troops to assist her husband. Following her address to the Council, Traitoro publicly betrays the Queen. The Queen then battles Traitoro in a parody of Spider-Man 3 and defeats him using a dust buster. With Traitoro's deceit exposed, the council is united with the queen.
At the Battle of Thermopylae, the Persians introduce their secret weapons, Ghost Rider and Rocky Balboa, who kills Sonio with a decapitating uppercut. Captain avenges him with Botox poisoning before being struck down by Xerxes. Leonidas pursues Xerxes and plays Grand Theft Auto:San Andreas. Managing to find the "Transformer Cube", Xerxes uses it in a car to become Xerxestron and shows off his powers to access the "Leave Britney Alone!" video on YouTube. However, Xerxestron accidentally trips on his extension cord and falls on Leonidas and the surviving Spartans, killing them. The blind Dilio eventually returns to Sparta to tell of Leonidas' final moments. A year later, Dilio leads a larger Spartan force to defeat the Persians, but the blind warrior ends up going the wrong way. They end up in Malibu, where they knock Lindsay Lohan down as she is leaving rehab again.
- Sean Maguire as King Leonidas
- Zachary Dylan Smith as young Leonidas
- Kevin Sorbo as Captain
- Carmen Electra as Queen Margo
- Ken Davitian as King Xerxes
- Diedrich Bader as Councilman Traitoro
- Travis Van Winkle as Sonio
- Jareb Dauplaise as Dilio
- Nicole Parker as Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Ellen DeGeneres, Paula Abdul
- Ike Barinholtz as Le Chiffre, Prophet, Dane Cook
- Hunter Clary as Leo Jr.
- Phil Morris as Messenger
- Method Man as Persian Emissary
- Ryan Fraley as Brad Pitt
- Tiffany Claus as Angelina Jolie
- Nick Steele as Kevin Federline
- Tony Yalda as Sanjaya Malakar
- Christopher Lett as Randy Jackson
- Jim Piddock as Loyalist, Simon Cowell
- Nate Haden as Ryan Seacrest
- Crista Flanagan as Oracle/Ugly Betty, Spartan Woman
- Robin Atkin Downes (uncredited) as Narrator
- Thomas McKenna as Tom Cruise
- Jesse Lewis IV as Ms. Jay Alexander
- Jenny Costa as Tyra Banks
- Belinda Waymouth as Twiggy
- Dean Cochran as Rocky Balboa, Rambo
- Emily Wilson as Lindsay Lohan
- John Di Domenico as Donald Trump
- Jim Nieb as George W. Bush
- Tiffany Haddish as Urban Girl
Films and TV showsEdit
- 300 (2006) (Main Parody)
- Shrek the Third (2007)
- Casino Royale (2006)
- Happy Feet (2006)
- American Idol (2002–present)
- Ghost Rider (2007)
- Stomp the Yard (2007)
- Spider-Man 3 (2007)
- Rocky Balboa (2006)
- Transformers (2007)
- Dead or No Deal
Meet the Spartans opened at number one at the US box office, grossing $18,505,530 over its opening weekend, narrowly edging out fellow newcomer Rambo, which was briefly parodied in the credits of this film. The film dropped 60.4% in its second weekend grossing $7,336,595 expanding to 2643 theaters while ranking fourth at the box office. The film grossed $38,233,676 in United States and Canada and grossed $45,787,889 internationally, adding up to a total worldwide gross of $84,021,565.
The film received overwhelmingly negative reviews from critics. On Rotten Tomatoes it has an approval rating of 2% based reviews from 49 critics, with an average rating of 1.86/10. The critical consensus reads: "A tired, unfunny, offensive waste of time, Meet the Spartans scrapes the bottom of the cinematic barrel." On Metacritic it has a weighted average score of 9 out of 100, based on 11 reviews, indicating "overwhelming dislike" and being the worst received film by the directors on the site. Audiences surveyed by CinemaScore gave the film a grade C- on a scale from A+ to F.
Variety called it "Lazy, lame and painfully unfunny, Meet the Spartans is yet another scrambled-genre parody." Frank Scheck of The Hollywood Reporter wrote: "Writer-directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer basically reprise the tired formula from their earlier efforts, which is to throw in as many pop culture references as possible to cover up the lack of any real wit." Jeannette Catsoulis of The New York Times gave it 1 out of 5 and wrote: "Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the team behind Meet the Spartans, prove that ridiculing other movies is much easier than making your own." Catsoulis said the various audience reactions at the screening she attended summed it up best: Eewwww! Aaarghh! Huh? Critic Garth Franklin of Dark Horizons called it "One of the most painfully bad comedies I've ever had to endure, and I've seen the collected works of Martin Lawrence, Tim Allen, Ice Cube AND Cedric the Entertainer."
The only positive review on Rotten Tomatoes came from Kam Williams of NewsBlaze who gave the film 2 out of 4 and wrote: "Don't expect anything of depth and you won't be disappointed by this predigested pabulum." Clark Collis of Entertainment Weekly gave it a mixed review, crediting the actors for their efforts but criticizing the script and the already dated jokes, giving it a grade C-.
Most of the film's criticism consisted of not having many actual jokes and instead having an over-reliance on pop culture references. Several recurring gags were criticized for being overused, such as the ambiguous sexuality of the Spartans and throwing various celebrities down the Pit of Death.
On January 21, 2009, the film received five nominations for the 29th Golden Raspberry Awards: Worst Picture (jointly with Disaster Movie), Worst Supporting Actress (Electra), Worst Director, Worst Screenplay, and Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off, or Sequel.
The film was released on Blu-ray Disc and DVD on June 3, 2008, in an "Unrated Pit of Death" Edition and a PG-13/theatrical release of the film. The theatrical cut does not include extras but includes widescreen and full screen versions on one dual disc. A "ruder & cruder" version was later released in the UK on August 18.
- "MEET THE SPARTANS (12A)". British Board of Film Classification. January 11, 2008. Retrieved March 15, 2015.
- "Meet the Spartans (2008) - Financial Information". The Numbers (website). Retrieved October 10, 2020.
- Meet the Spartans at Box Office Mojo
- Meet the Spartans at IMDb
- Leydon, Joe (January 25, 2008). "Meet the Spartans". Variety.
- Levin, Josh (January 30, 2008). "Meet the Spartans: another terrible spoof movie from the nongeniuses who brought you Date Movie and Epic Movie". Slate Magazine. Retrieved September 16, 2020.
- Clark Collis (February 6, 2008). "Meet the Spartans". Entertainment Weekly.
- "US Movie Box Office Chart Weekend of January 25, 2008". The Numbers. Retrieved January 31, 2008.
- "Meet the Spartans (2008)". Rotten Tomatoes. Retrieved October 10, 2020.
- "Meet the Spartans (2008): Reviews". Metacritic. Retrieved April 1, 2020.
- Joshua Rich (January 29, 2008). "Spartans stops Rambo". Entertainment Weekly.
the movie’s CinemaScore was a terrible C- (coming from a crowd that was, not surprisingly 58 percent male and three-quarters under the age of 25)
- Scheck, Frank. "Meet the Spartans - Bottom Line: "300" was funnier". The Hollywood Reporter. Retrieved January 28, 2008.
Scheck, Frank (January 26, 2008). "Obvious gags, laugh-free jokes vanquish "Spartans"". Reuters.
- Catsoulis, Jeannette (January 26, 2008). "Doing Battle on the Field of Parody (Published 2008)". The New York Times. Archived from the original on October 7, 2017.
- Gene Seymour (2008). "'Meet the Spartans'". Newsday. Archived from the original on October 16, 2010.
What's the point of making a parody that's dumber than the stuff it parodies?
- Franklin, Garth (January 25, 2008). "Review: "Meet the Spartans"". Dark Horizons.
- Williams, Kam (January 26, 2008). "Meet the Spartans Film Review". NewsBlaze News.
- Meet the Spartans (Christopher Lennertz) at Filmtracks.com
- John Wilson (January 21, 2009). "RAZZIES.COM 2008 Nominations". Razzie Awards. Retrieved January 21, 2009.
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