Wikipedia:Peer review/Matthew Charlton/archive1

Matthew Charlton edit

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I have lifted it to GA status and would like to raise it to A or FA status.


Thanks, Littleteddy (roar!) 12:24, 10 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) edit

Hey, nice article. Some comments which may help elevate it toward A/FA status.

  • I think WP:LEAD would recommend around three paragraphs in the lead. I don't particularly like single sentence paragraphs, like the opening sentence of the lead, so consider merging the five paras you have there now into three.
  • Link Victoria in the lead.
  • "in getting Australia to adopt " reads a little clumsily to me...
  • Personal thing, but I would split Lambton, New South Wales into Lambton, New South Wales and add (NSW) afterwards so the acronym is well understood by the non-Australian readers.
  • You've linked the Australian Labor Party twice in the lead, no need for that.
  • I think the article, in general, is too segmented by the section headings. The sections themselves are relatively short so could be merged (with appropriate renaming of section headings).
  • Don't think you need the Australian Labor Party as a See also as well!

I think for A-class you'll need to sort out the above but also expand the article a bit. I hope my comments have helped a bit. The Rambling Man (talk) 18:02, 17 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]