Wikipedia:Peer review/Angel in Disguise (Brandy song)/archive1

I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like some feedback on what should/could be done to prepare the article for GAN then to a FA. Any comments would be appreciated.


Thanks, Sunrise In Brooklyn 20:55, 10 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Unlimitedlead

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Welcome to PR, SunriseInBrooklyn. Not sure if you've been here before, but we're glad to have you. Seeing as you are relatively new to the GA/FA processes, I will try to reminisce on my rookie days (not that long ago, if you're wondering) and make this as painless as possible.

  • File:Rodney Darkchild Jerkins (11149414586).jpg lacks tags on Commons.
  • Ditto with File:JanetJacksonUnbreakableTourSanFran2015 (cropped).jpg
  • Ditto with File:Aaliyah-08.jpg
  • Add WP:ALT to all images.
  • Citations 2 & 14 have error messages.
  • Citation 6 says pp. but it only cites one page.
  • If Never Say Never was released in 1998, why does the infobox say that "Angel in Disguise" was released in 1999?
  • "'Angel in Disguise' is a song recorded by American singer Brandy Norwood..." The "recorded" is superfluous here.
  • "...and produced by the former along with Norwood" It is unclear who "the former" refers to.
  • "...which became one of Norwood's most popular songs" This doesn't seem to be mentioned in the article?
  • "...short-lived television series, Thea in 1993" The comma does not appear to be necessary.
  • "...Norwood began work on her self-titled debut album launched by Atlantic Records in 1994" Seeing as there has been a chronological jump, I would say: "...Norwood began work on her self-titled debut album, which was released by Atlantic Records in 1994"
  • "therefore" is a strange choice of wording; I would just remove it.
  • There is a space before the comma following LaShawn Daniels.
  • ""And I love you baby".Never Say Never" Fix the spacing.
  • "...four minutes and forty-eight seconds (4:48)." No need for the numbers if you're just going to say it using words.
  • "By 1998, Never Say Never had been certified..." Why the past perfect tense?
  • "...BBC Music , was positive..." Fix the spacing.
  • The Track listings section is unsourced.

That is what I got from a quick skim of the article, specifically looking at the lead, infobox, Background and recording and Composition and lyrics sections. Evidently there are several issues with the article, especially in terms of readability. The sources are also quite sparce and of dubious reliability. Unfortunately I do not think this article is currently in shape for GA or FA; it is good that it was brought to PR for feedback. Good luck, Unlimitedlead (talk) 01:51, 11 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@SunriseInBrooklyn Have you seen this? Unlimitedlead (talk) 11:18, 17 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Unlimitedlead Yes, and I understand this article is currently not in shape for GA or FA yet, but did fixing that you mentioned. Sunrise In Brooklyn 19:15, 17 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Okay, just checking. No rush at all; I just noticed that several of my comments had not yet been addressed. Take your time and good luck with writing this article. Cheers, Unlimitedlead (talk) 20:30, 17 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Unlimitedlead So far, that's all I done to improved for this article. Sunrise In Brooklyn 21:21, 18 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Z1720

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Comments after a quick skim:

  • The "Reception" section falls into the "X said Y" pattern and relies on quotes. WP:RECEPTION has ideas on how to avoid this.
  • WP:A/S has a list of sources that might be included in the article. I mention this because the article has less sources than I would expect for this topic.
  • Ref 19 information needs to be expanded upon. What is the website, access date, and date it was posted?
  • Suggest archiving sources using IABot

I hope this helps. Z1720 (talk) 16:54, 29 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Aoba47

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Unfortunately, I do not have the time to do a full prose review of this article, but I did want to say that File:Brandy-Angel in Disguise.ogg needs much stronger justification for inclusion. It is encouraged to keep non-free media usage to a minimum, and it should only be used in cases where it illustrates a point that cannot be conveyed through the prose alone. I prefer song articles to have an audio sample, but the current caption (Brandy saying the prelude of the song before the chorus.) does not justify its inclusion, and the WP:FUR is incomplete (i.e. the N.A. bits). The sample should either be removed or a stronger justification be added. Aoba47 (talk) 02:14, 30 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]