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Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/Roberto Clemente Award/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was promoted by Scorpion0422 23:34, 13 June 2009 [1].

Roberto Clemente Award

edit
Nominator(s):  iMatthew :  Chat  13:49, 24 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Toolbox

Same reason as always. :)  iMatthew :  Chat  13:49, 24 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Support I made some copyedits, and everything looks fantastic! Reywas92Talk 17:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Resolved comments from Truco
Lead
  • 'The Roberto Clemente Award is given annually to a Major League Baseball (MLB) player selected who best exemplifies the game of baseball, sportsmanship, community involvement and the individual's contribution to his team.' -- The bolding of the article name is awkward, Roberto Clemente Award should be the only thing bolded.
  • 'MLB has presented this award, originally known as the Commissioner's Award, since 1971.' -- IMO it would read better as Originally known as the Commissioner's Award, MLB has presented this award since 1971.
  • 'In 1973, the award was renamed after Clemente after he was killed in a plane crash while delivering supplies to victims of the Nicaragua earthquake.' -- A link to plane crash isn't really needed. Is there a link to an article about his specific plane crash? If not, its best to remove that link.
  • 'In the past few years, the player with the highest amount of votes received online via MLB.com gets one vote in addition to the votes cast by the panel' -- Is there a specific time frame, because 'past few years' is a bit WP:WEASEL. In addition, this may sound a bit unnecessary but instead of 'via MLB.com' it would be better to state it as via MLB's official website, MLB.com,
  • 'Since 2000, the winner receives a trophy and $25,000 donation from John Hancock Financial Services (JHFS) that goes to their charity of choice. ' --> Since 2000, the winner has received a trophy and $25,000 donation from John Hancock Financial Services (JHFS) that goes to their charity of choice.
  • The lead needs to be expanded to summarize the list more, ie. First, most recent winners, and any other significant winners. Stats may also be worth mentioning, like who was the first of such and such to win the award, etc.
Award winners
  • Add a key explaining the positions
  • Consider linking each year to that year's MLB season?
References
  • The ESPN ref should have ESPN.com as the work and the publisher as ESPN Internet Ventures.
  • For the Baseball-reference ref, the publisher is Sports Illustrated LLC, while Baseball-reference is the work.--Truco 19:32, 24 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
I think I got everything. Let me know if anything else isn't right. Thanks!  iMatthew :  Chat  19:59, 24 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support -- Well you get my first support since coming back =] Great work on this list that meets WP:WIAFL. You might want to consider, however, splitting this table into tables from the AL and NL since its a bit longer than your other FLC.--Truco 18:56, 25 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Resolved comments from KV5
Comments from KV5
  • Sports Reference LLC, not Sports Illustrated
  • "one player out of 30 nominees" - comparables, 1 or thirty
  • "Teams chose their nominee during the regular season" - everything else is in present tense, "chose" should be choose
  • "Now, tThe player with the highest amount of votes"
  • If MLB.com is going to be linked in the Hank Aaron Award, it should be linked here.
  • "the winner has received a trophy and $25,000 donation" - a $25,000 donation
  • "The nominees that don't win" - no contractions

Hope this helps. KV5 (Talk • Phils) 13:57, 25 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support from KV5 (Talk • Phils) 14:32, 4 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comments –

  • "The Roberto Clemente Award is given annually to a Major League Baseball (MLB) player selected who best exemplifies...". The "player selected who" part is awkward.
  • "the award was renamed after Clemente after...". Don't like two "after"s in three words.
  • "out of 30 nominees, one nominee from each club." Remove second "nominee" as redundant.
  • Remove space before reference at end of second paragraph.
  • Don't think the table should be split because there is only one award for the whole league, as opposed to most other baseball awards. Giants2008 (17-14) 23:42, 28 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support, all issues resolved. Dabomb87 (talk) 18:23, 13 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved issues, Dabomb87 (talk)
Comments from Dabomb87 (talk · contribs)
  • There needs to be a note about where each hidden year link goes to—see Silver Slugger Award.
  • "The Roberto Clemente Award is given annually to a Major League Baseball (MLB) player selected who best exemplifies the game of baseball, sportsmanship, community involvement and the individual's contribution to his team." Since this is basically a direct lift from the source, can you use quotes? "The Roberto Clemente Award is given annually to a Major League Baseball (MLB) player selected who "best exemplifies the game of baseball, sportsmanship, community involvement and the individual's contribution to his team". You also need to mention that the awardee is selected through voting. See Silver Slugger Award again as an example for the wording.
  • "Originally known as the Commissioner's Award, MLB has presented this award since 1971." Dangling modifier, sounds as if the MLB was originally known as the Commissioner's Award.
  • "1 player out of 30 nominees"-->1 player from 30 nominees
  • "The player with the highest amount of votes received online via MLB's official website"-->The player who receives the most votes via MLB's official website
  • "The first winner of the award was Willie Mays, while the most recent winner was Albert Pujols. " "while"-->and
  • "The first pitcher to win the award was Phil Niekro in 1980, while the first catcher to win the award was Gary Carter in 1989." Same thing. Also, I'd appreciate it if the inline citations were put in numeric order. Dabomb87 (talk) 20:56, 30 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
    • I got most of this, except the second part of bullet 2, and the entire bullet 3. Please help me with those? I don't understand what you mean. Also, I've used that source in other FL's and it's never been a problem. I'd say there is nothing to make it un-reliable.  iMatthew :  Chat  (Review Me) 11:48, 6 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
      • For bullet 2, do the same thing you did for the Hank Aaron list. I'll rephrase the sentence with the dangling modifier. For the queried source, we need to know the site's fact-checking methods and/or if they are supported by a well-known third-pary institution. Please see Wikipedia:Wikipedia Signpost/2008-06-26/Dispatches for more information. Dabomb87 (talk) 23:09, 6 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Sources look good. Dabomb87 (talk) 18:23, 13 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • I fixed everything, and got the source removed. I forgot this was still open. Sorry for the late replies!  iMatthew :  Chat  17:59, 13 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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