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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/1960 Winter Olympics/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by User:Ian Rose 19:04, 25 August 2013 [1].

1960 Winter Olympics

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Nominator(s): H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:47, 19 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I am nominating this for featured article because I feel it meets the FA criteria and is consistent with other FAs on specific Olympic Games. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:47, 19 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Image review

  • File:Flagpole_Egmont_Copenhagen.jpg: as Denmark has freedom of panorama only for buildings, what is the licensing of the work photographed?
  • File:Ann_Heggtveit_1960.jpg: under which of the listed rationales are you claiming PD-Canada?
  • It was subject to Crown copyright and was published more than 50 years ago. Should this be specified in the PD tag or is it enough to indicate it here? H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:11, 20 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Here is fine, but was this actually published in 1960, or just created then? Do we know when/where it was first published? It's from the still photography division, which means it wasn't necessarily broadcast by NFB...Nikkimaria (talk) 02:56, 20 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fixed I've searched the Library and Archives and the place of creation or original publish location is unknown. I did a Google image search to no avail as well. So I will delete the image. Thanks! H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 18:21, 20 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • File:Olympic_rings_without_rims.svg needs a US PD tag. Nikkimaria (talk) 22:26, 19 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Comment The nominator should be aware that the USOC's 1960 report is in the public domain as copyright not renewed. I think there is a copy on the la84foundation website but I can't find it offhand (I have a hard copy of it). Also in the public domain is the Squaw Valley Organizing Committee report, in the public domain as lacking a copyright notice here. It is well illustrated, but you can get a head start if you like at the Avery Brundage article where there are two PD pictures of him at Squaw Valley. But I should be able to supply you, if you need it, with an image of any prominent member of the US team from the 1960 USOC report.--Wehwalt (talk) 15:32, 22 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you I do have an electronic copy of the Squaw Valley Oganizing Committee report but since I'm not fully versed on copyright policies I didn't include any images from the report. Are you saying that if the report is in the public domain then any images contained therein would also be PD? H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 16:00, 22 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
That is the position I have taken, unless they are clearly attributed to a news service.--Wehwalt (talk) 22:28, 22 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
I've added one of the Brundage images from his page, I think that should suffice, there are plenty of images that passed the image check. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:20, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Comments
  • The extra sentence about Jenberg's later medals is not relevant, especially not in the lead.
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The first sentence of the second paragraph is a run-on; rewrite it for grammatical clarity.
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • It says California received the flag at the 1956 Olympics in February, but the Games awarded to SV until April. Is this timeline correct? Just a little strange.
Looks like a mistake to me. Quick and dirty research says that they were granted the Olympics at the IOC's Paris session in 1955, conditional on the financing which is discussed in the article. That would allow them to get the flag at Cortina, and for Brundage to call upon the youth of the world to assemble at Squaw Valley at the Cortina Closing Ceremony, but if they didn't meet the conditions they'd have been out and Innsbruck would have been in.--Wehwalt (talk) 15:51, 22 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • That is corrent, I tried to clarify that a little in the article but I'll take another look. I don't want the muddy the water with technicalities on when the IOC awarded the Games but I also do want to get it historically accurate. I'll see if there's a better way to word it. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 15:55, 22 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The US had last hosted 28 years earlier and 56 years earlier, so I find it pretty meaningless that it was the first Games to receive US federal funding. Would it really have been expected during the Depression?
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Semicolon in the first sentence of TV section, and lose the comma after 'gate'.
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • No comma after 'not allow China'
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ceremony: Quotation marks on Pageantry Committee not needed. "planned on an opening that would..." So did it actually happen or did he just plan on it?
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • -> 40-, 60-, and 80-meter jumps
Fixed H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 00:18, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Nations: 'A total of' is superfluous.
  • The sentence starts with a number now, which I'm not thrilled about. I'll word smith a little.
  • I see no reason why Netherlands, Poland, Czech, and Italy should be excluded from the medal table, or why there should be a separate article just to include them.
    • Fixed - just following convention, I added the other countries in.

Great work. Reywas92Talk 14:47, 22 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Great job on the article. Support Reywas92Talk 09:44, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Yay thanks! H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 14:04, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments –

  • Host city selection: Typo in "the United State Olympic Committee".
Fixed, found another such typo in the same section fixed also. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 14:14, 25 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Organization: Second word of "Blyth arena" should be capitalized.
Fixed throughout the article - couple instances. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 14:14, 25 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Funding for Cushings initial bid to the IOC...". "Cushings" → "Cushing's".
Fixed
  • Television: "During the Games CBS broadcast...". Apostrophe after "Games"?
See my reply below. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 14:14, 25 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
That works just as well, and maybe better. Giants2008 (Talk) 02:11, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Extended version: "During the Games CBS broadcast 31 hours of television focusing on ice hockey, speed skating, figure skating, alpine skiing and ski jumping." This whole sentence is missing "were aired" or something similar.
  • Events: "The sport of biathlon was added to the program as was speed skating events for women." "was" → "were". Giants2008 (Talk) 16:27, 24 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Fixed - Thank you for your review, it's good to see you're still doing your thing here at FAC. Keep it up! H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 14:14, 25 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • Figure skating: A contraction ("wouldn't") should be expanded to its full form per the MoS.
    • Participating nations: Comma before "it would be the last for many years" should probably be a semi-colon instead.
      • Fixed
    • Apartheid shouldn't be capitalized.
      • Fixed
    • A page number would be nice for ref 55. Giants2008 (Talk) 02:37, 26 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Parutakupiu

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  • Change dates in infobox to day-month format as it is used in the article body.
  • Infobox autoformats the date. If you look in the edit page it will be as you have suggested but it comes out the other way around, not sure how to fix this. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 15:38, 29 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • You're right. I didn't remember that the dates were hardcoded within a sub-template of the infobox. I fixed it so the dates now appear in dmy format. Parutakupiu (talk) 21:21, 29 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • I think the first "Squaw Valley" link should point to the geographical place (Squaw Valley, Placer County, California), not the resort itself.
  • "Squaw Valley hosted athletes from thirty nations who competed in four sports and 27 events." – figures should be presented in either numerical format or spelled out.
  • "... allowed entry to athletes from Communist countries entry."
  • Link United States Olympic Committee.
  • Need a source stating Innsbruck, St. Moritz and Chamonix as Squaw Valley's rival bidding cities.
  • Shouldn't it be "were" in "Another $4,000,000 was committed..."?
  • I had to see what "incensed" meant as I'm not a native English speaker. Please, provide a more common synonym.
  • Can't see the need to place the bid results table under a separate sub-section. Also, no need to make it collapsible (remove hide/show option).
  • Unlink "closing ceremonies" since they do not point to the 1956 Winter Olympics closing ceremony (WP:EGG).
  • "... three outside skating rinks, a 400 meter speed skating oval..." → outdoor and '400-meter'
  • The issues are still there: outside→outdoor, 400 meter→400-meter. Parutakupiu (talk) 21:21, 29 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "quartz clock" instead of "quartz clock"
  • Ref 20 (which is a note in fact) could be included in the section text.
  • "There were 27 events contested in eight sports contested."
  • "The Olympic flame was lit by Kenneth Henry,..." – you mean the Olympic cauldron?
  • "Swedish Lumberjack Sixten Jernberg..." – lowercase Lumberjack
  • "... became the first non-Nordic athlete not from a Nordic country..."
  • "The German pair Marika Kilius and Hans-Jürgen Bäumler..." – unlink German (same link given earlier)
  • The calendar section states that hockey games were played on the day of the opening ceremony (18) but the calendar table contradicts that.
  • Are the delegation sizes of participating nations known?
  • I think this can be found though I'm not sure where they would be added. I could put them in the participant country listing next to the country. I'll do a little looking. I've found a source that has this info but it's on individual country pages and that may not be ideal for referencing purposes. I'll dig a little though. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 15:38, 29 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The place to add that figure is within the {{flagIOC}}, after a pipe following the "1960 Winter" value (e.g. {{flagIOC|ARG|1960 Winter|XX}}, where XX is the delegation size). As a source you can use Sports Reference Olympics; I've checked and they have delegation sizes there. Parutakupiu (talk) 21:21, 29 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • I've added the delegation sizes and a reference to the country list in Sports Reference. This will allow the user to select the individual countries to get the information specific to that country. I felt that would be more aesthetically pleasing than to put the link to the specific country page next to each nation. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 15:04, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • In medal count section, provide a legend for the host nation color.
  • Why do some nations appear with the IOC code and others don't?
  • Explain why the total of gold, silver and bronze medals is not the same.
  • Remove the link "Events at the 1960 Winter Olympics" that links to "List of 1960 Winter Olympics medal winners" (already listed).

— Parutakupiu (talk) 23:37, 26 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • Thanks for the review. I'm almost done with the fixes. I have a couple of responses to suggestions that I'll enter under the pertinent suggestion. Thanks again! H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 16:01, 27 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Perhaps you could add an image of one of the most prominent venues in the corresponding section? From what I read here, the official Games report appears not to have copyright so you can take images from it...? Parutakupiu (talk) 21:27, 29 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose, 1a. I'm finding too many errors, some of them basic grammar. I also find the writing to be quite imprecise. Examples:

  • What's an "undeveloped resort"? If it's undeveloped, it's just land.
  • You write about Squaw Valley and Squaw Valley Ski Resort synonymously, though they are different things.
  • "who was inspired to an Olympic bid" A verb is needed in here.
  • "Cushing and the USOC received a resolution passed by the United States Congress and signed by President Dwight Eisenhower, calling on the International Olympic Committee (IOC) to consider Squaw Valley's bid for the 1960 Games." I don't understand why you've worded it this way. What do you mean he "received a resolution"? Do you mean Congress sent the resolution to him? Or that he benefited from the resolution?
  • Grammar: "Another $4,000,000 were committed"
  • "the bid would be awarded to Innsbruck" More imprecise language. Cities submitted bids, but the bids weren't "awarded".
  • In the lead you say there were 27 events in 4 sports, but later you say 8 sports? Oy.

This actually needs a lot of work, probably by an editor new to to text. Some of it is surface-level copyediting, but a lot of it needs to be rewritten to use more precise language. The whole thing needs to be checked for internal consistency of facts as well. --Laser brain (talk) 14:25, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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