Talk:Sustainable Technology Optimization Research Center
This article is rated C-class on Wikipedia's content assessment scale. It is of interest to the following WikiProjects: | |||||||||||||||||||||
|
Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
editThis article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Annalisemetzger, Tori Sepulveda.
Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 03:57, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
Outline feedback
edit04-19-2016: Good evening Tori!
You have a lot of information present here! Great job so far! I do have to agree with Dr. Fulton's comment below in that there is a little bit of a biased tone, but I do think that it is a good idea to include the importance of what is going on at the STORC. For this, maybe just alter a few describing words here and there.
I think that the article may be more powerful if after the intro and before going into the specific components of STORC's projects, an additional paragraph were added about the general STORC closed loop system: from compost-> soil-> plants-> food-> compost-> worms, fish, water, etc. (Unless what I am describing is meant to go in the "MTSS" paragraph, then cool).
Also, I think the "Why the STORC?" paragraph may do better toward the end of the article. I think that the intro did a great job of implying the benefits and importance of STORC initially, so you could probably scoot the "Why the STORC?" paragraph to the bottom of the page.
Other than this, I feel like this will develop into a very interesting and thorough article that will be very beneficial for STORC!
GREAT JOB TORI!!!!!
Outline Feedback Response
edit04-24-2016: "Haley!"
I have looked over my article and will be changing some of the describing words you mentioned! About the paragraph after the intro, Anna is working on describing the MTSS system, which is what you suggested! Regarding the "Why the STORC?" section, I agree, once I get more info added I will probably move it to the bottom of the page. Thanks for you input!
Tori Sepulveda (talk) 19:39, 24 April 2016 (UTC)
— Preceding unsigned comment added by Misshaleyrobinson (talk • contribs) 07:08, 20 April 2016 (UTC)
Hi Victoria and Anna,
This looks great! Did you figure out how to divide the work?
Try and keep your headings as general as possible, e.g. might section II be "Mission"?
There seems to be overlap in sections IV and V too.
What does "it is biased however" mean under Problems Initiating STORC work?
Go ahead and start formatting your page and filling in your sections!
Julianfulton (talk) 21:50, 14 March 2016 (UTC)
During my interview with Dr. Murphy and Dr. Burton some of the information seemed biased, I will speak with you in class.