Talk:Jubilation (song)/GA1
Latest comment: 7 years ago by Aoba47 in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Aoba47 (talk · contribs) 17:47, 17 March 2017 (UTC)
- I might as well finish the remaining Streisand song nominations you have active lol Aoba47 (talk) 17:47, 17 March 2017 (UTC)
- Comments
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- The second sentence of the first paragraph of the lead is a little bit awkwardly constructed due to the repetition of a variation of "write" in both the beginning independent clause and the main part of the sentence. I would revise this to make it flow a little bit stronger, especially as it is one of the first sentences a reader would encounter when opening this article for the first time. The last part of the sentence regarding the song's release feels a little tacked-on, and it may be beneficial to just make it into its own sentence or more seamlessly integrate it into the sentence during the revisions for my previous comment.
- In the last sentence of the lead's first paragraph, I would put the information about the song being included on the Anka's compilation album before the information about the cover just to keep the information going seamlessly from that about the main artist (Anka) to the cover versions. You could just switch around the order and it would read a little better in my opinion at least.
- Include the reference for the quote in the lead. Quotes in the lead require citations even if the information is present in the body of the article. You could also revise it to not include the quote and paraphrase the information if you prefer to not have a reference in the lead for any reason.
- In the lead, you say that the song's lyrics are about preaching to Jesus. I can see that it is about preaching, but I do not immediately see the information about the singer preaching to Jesus in particular.
- Final comments
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- @Carbrera: Wonderful job with this article. My comments are relatively minor, and I could only find small issues with the lead. Let me know when you are addressed my review and I will pass this. Aoba47 (talk) 17:57, 17 March 2017 (UTC)
- @Aoba47: Thank you for the kind words. I make changes to the article. I will also try to add a few more to the start of my review for your FAC. Regards as always, Carbrera (talk) 01:18, 18 March 2017 (UTC).
- Thank you! Everything looks good to me. ✓ Pass Aoba47 (talk) 01:25, 18 March 2017 (UTC)