Talk:Depleted community

Revisions to Page

After studying uneven development and economic disparities in my SOCI 280 course (listed above), I became aware of the issue of "depleted communities". Looking at the short stub on depleted community on Wikipedia, I decided to revise the page for many reasons. Depleted communities are important to study and understand because their very existence, resulting from uneven development, proves that there is inequality inherent in capitalism, or the way it is practiced. These communities, while still socially relevant, lack the capabilities of achieving economic growth because of capitalistic pursuits in their past or elsewhere. In addition, this is a very relevant issue because depleted communities can be seen all over the globe as countries move into a democratic capitalistic society, asking for a global effort in pursuing a solution. To start, I plan to better define the term “depleted community” and briefly include the implications of the depleted communities, including how they challenge the current system of capitalism, and how important the sense of community is essential to the sustainability of these communities. Thus I would make it clear that this is both an economic and social issue.

Since the current stub is only an introduction, I will add actual sections to the article. I will look at uneven development, uneven development and its locations, Capitalism’s effects on development, uneven development in other economic systems, and possible solutions. The current stub briefly mentions uneven development, capitalism, and social and economic aspects, but simply lacks elaboration on all topics. In the Uneven Development, I will focus on the average pattern of depleted communities, including their overall growth and decline, and talk about the political systems that are in place during this time period. I will also discuss the economic practices in place and the role of the social community in the area in the decline of these communities. Uneven development is a highly complex issue, and very contextual, as it can develop in different areas at different rates, and I will make that clear as well.

In looking at locations of uneven development, I will identify areas that, although previously experiencing economic growth, are now in heavy economic decline. I will not only look at areas in the United States, but areas all around the globe, in an effort to show that depleted communities are a global issue.

Next, in looking at development in other economic systems, I will look at areas in economic decline in areas that do not practice capitalism (specifically China), highlighting the difference between those areas and areas affected by capitalism. In relation to this, we will have a section that addresses specifically the impact of capitalism in forming depleted communities, including factors in public policy formed and industrialization’s role in uneven development.

Lastly, I will offer possible solutions in helping these depleted communities, including the funding of new economic ventures (businesses), investment of infrastructure, and other possible solutions including public policy initiatives and urban renewal. This subtopic will also address the difficulties in dealing with depleted communities.

Please feel free to comment or make suggestions in regards to my revisions for this article. Thanks! Njeri Muturi (talk) 02:49, 10 March 2012 (UTC)

Are you saying that capitalism causes poverty or disability in these 'depleted communities'?

If so, then I disagree. Capitalism is merely the absence of violence (including state violence). How can an absence of something cause anything? And causation is a relative thing, that is, to say that capitalism causes poverty one must say poverty relative to what condition which would result from what other system? What system are you taking as the alternative to capitalism? Its diametric opposite, war communism where all activity is centrally controlled and any deviation from the commands of the state is punished, that is, anything which is not compulsory is prohibited? As is now well-known, war communism leads to universal and extreme poverty, starvation, and death. JRSpriggs (talk) 08:59, 10 March 2012 (UTC)

Thank you for your comment JRSpriggs! In this article I was not aiming to blame capitalism for poverty and disability. I was merely trying to point out that certain aspects in the practice of capitalism may perpetuate these things. For example, over-accumulation can lead to many social problems through its inevitable devaluation (causing firms to really suffer), and over-accumulation is inherent in capitalism. I also gave China as a case study example to show that depleted communities happen under different political economies. Reading my revised article, can you see a difference in the way i addressed capitalism and it's effects?

Thanks, Njeri Muturi (talk) 23:14, 24 April 2012 (UTC)

Review and Suggestions

This is an extremely interesting article - I think this information can be very beneficial to students and intellectuals who are curious about the subject.

There are a few edit suggestions/questions that I want to make:

- I think the most important changes you need to make are including references and citing your information by linking them to your references. Although you do have some in-text citations, other times you do not and I think you need to include where you got your information.

- What picture are you referring to in “Uneven development & its locations”?

- I think your page could really benefit from linking to other articles and Wikipedia pages. I think that would help make it more integrated into the Wikipedia community and will allow it to be easier to read your page if you want to know more about certain words or topics. I also think that it would be beneficial to link to the Wikiprojects you’ve joined.

- Your page also made me think a lot of Flint, Michigan and the Michael Moore documentary, “Roger & Me.” I think this would be another very good example of a depleted community in the United States that you can use. Furthermore, it could be interesting to add how the media portrays these depleted communities in documentary’s like “Roger & Me” and other films, books, etc.

Juliabarrow3 (talk) 5:35, 7 April 2012 (UTC)

Thanks so much for your comment Julia!! I will make sure to double check my citations, and also check out "Roger & Me". I have linked many pages to my article now, including urban decay and capitalism! Njeri Muturi (talk) 23:17, 24 April 2012 (UTC)

Suggested revisions

Hey Njeri,

Here are a few suggestions I have for your article, which looks really good so far!

• In your introduction paragraph, you provided some links that are probably unnecessary such as space and place.
• Add period: “…which some consider an inherent feature of capitalism”
• Consider paraphrasing the quote at the beginning of the “Uneven development & its locations” section.
• Typo: “bringing lowering life expectancy”
• What do you mean by “afterwards” in the first sentence under the “Causes of uneven development” section?
• What do you mean by “wrong goods” in the first paragraph of the “Causes of uneven development” section?
• “Leading to a variety of social implications” – Can you give examples?
• “The geographic differences that may benefit/harm areas ask the respective areas” – What do you mean by this?
• “Which is prevalent in areas like Sub-Saharan Africa” – Change “is” to “are.”
• Consider rephrasing: “In a world of uneven development, choices and capabilities can be determined ‘logic of capital’ instead of by social choice.”
• The section “Capitalist public policy” seems to focus on South Africa. I would consider either incorporating other examples or adding this section to your South Africa case study.
• In the title “Uneven development in other economic systems,” what do you mean by “other?”
• I would consider expanding your “Possible solutions in policy” section.

Jak8 (talk) 03:17, 9 April 2012 (UTC)

Thank you, Jak8! I pretty much incorporated all of your additions into my article, they were all very helpful! Njeri Muturi (talk) 23:26, 24 April 2012 (UTC)

Revision suggestions

Good job with this so far! Obviously the biggest thing that you need to do is work on adding your citations, which I’m sure you already know.

In the introduction, I can see that you left some of the previous article in place. Parts of it are frankly confusing, and I think that the parts you’ve added make more sense. Feel free to cut, but make sure to cite the things that you add.

In the uneven development section, consider whether you need to use that whole quote or if you should paraphrase it. If you’re going to keep it, consider putting it in “block quote” format (you can see an example on the page I’m editing).

A major thing that I think you should consider in this article is how to make sure you’re not overlapping too much with uneven development. Obviously you have a lot of valid information, but your sections seem to have a lot of overlap with uneven development and not a ton of structure specifically around depleted communities. Great work so far! Allisonraven (talk) 05:15, 9 April 2012 (UTC)

Thanks for all of your suggestions Allison, I incorporated many of them (especially the one about overlapping with uneven development too much) Njeri Muturi (talk) 23:32, 24 April 2012 (UTC)

Suggestions

In relation to your content, maybe you can change your first one to make it sound more professional, perhaps "Location of Uneven development" or separate them into two sections. Furthermore, you may want to capitalize the words in your section, although that is a very minor point. Furthermore, because you group the fourth section by country, it may make more intuitive sense to name your section "Uneven Development in Various Countries". In the last section, I would refrain from targeting a specific country, ie. the Chinese, because the policy solutions should cover a broad and generalized scope. In general, I feel that the "Possible Solutions" section can be expanded and even have subsections. But I understand that creating a new article is a huge undertaking and that you have to focus in on certain sections. But in the case that you want to add to your "Possible Solutions" section, perhaps you can break down policy into economic, social, and political categories. This has been mentioned before, but I imagine that you will have completed your citations by Friday. In the Capitalist section, often times is two words. "El Paso is a prime example of a depleted community because of a declining rate of human capital resulting from a poor economy." This would be a much stronger comment if you can back it up with statistics. What is the declining rate, and how does it compare with others. But overall, great work! AlisaYu (talk) 04:08, 11 April 2012 (UTC)

Thanks Alisa! You definitely gave some inciteful comments, and I will try to incorporate them! Njeri Muturi (talk) 23:36, 24 April 2012 (UTC)

Wikipedia Ambassador Program course assignment

This article is the subject of an educational assignment at Rice University supported by the Wikipedia Ambassador Program during the 2011 Q3 term. Further details are available on the course page.

The above message was substituted from {{WAP assignment}} by PrimeBOT (talk) on 16:51, 2 January 2023 (UTC)