Talk:Aurelia Henry Reinhardt/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 13:47, 16 November 2018 (UTC)

Comments

• "completed ... completed" is a little repetitive.
  •  Done
• Lead could use replacing one or two of the "she was" with "Reinhardt was" for variety if nothing else.
  •  Done
• "was survived by his widow and " seems a little odd to refer to the subject of the article as "his widow", although I know strictly it's accurate.
  •  Done
• I would merge the first two very short paras of the Career section, it would improve the aesthetics without damaging the flow.
  •  Done
• "In 1928 she was a Republican elector from California.[17]" followed by "In 1922 she traveled..." feels anomalous to me.
  •  Done
• No need to relink San Francisco, no need to clarify you mean the one in California either.
  •  Done
• "in Palo Alto, California" link it first time round.
  •  Done
• First World War vs World War II, I'd pick a "style" and stick with it.
  •  Done
• May be a dumb question, but what is the "California State Mother"? Do we have anything we can link it to?
  • In short, no. The GRC and their associated AMC and MOTY award appear to be depression era artifacts, and it's not clear they any of them survived until modern times. It's possible they did, but in a form that's not easy to connect without significant digging. At any rate, I added a lengthy footnote explaining things in more detail. GMG^talk 14:16, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
• Use consistent date formats in the references.
  •  Done
• Don't use hyphens for year ranges, use en-dash per MOS:DASH.
  •  Done
• Same for page ranges/volume ranges, en-dash again.
  •  Done
• And letter ranges, no spaced hyphens, use unspaced en-dashes.
  • I'm not sure I follow. Looks like the remaining hyphens are in "post-graduate", in ISBNs, or taken verbatim from the style of source titles. GMG^talk 14:16, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
    • E.g. Ref 1 has a year range in the title with the years separated by a hyphen, not an en-dash. We don't do verbatim source titles in that regard, we correct those for house style. The Rambling Man (talk) 17:27, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
      •  Done GMG^talk 18:58, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
• "Lynn Townsend White, Jr." we no longer use commas in such names.
  •  Done

That's about it. It's a very good piece of work, the above would just neaten up some of the more technical aspects, the existing content is great. So I'll put it on hold for now. The Rambling Man (talk) 16:52, 17 November 2018 (UTC)

Thanks for the review TRM. I think I've mostly addressed the points above. Lemme know if there's anything else you can spot that can improve what we've got. GMG^talk 14:16, 19 November 2018 (UTC)

I'm satisfied with all that, a couple of minor adjustments from me, but content to promote now. Good work. The Rambling Man (talk) 19:04, 19 November 2018 (UTC)