Talk:Annie Hall/GA2

Latest comment: 10 years ago by TonyTheTiger in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: TonyTheTiger (talk · contribs) 08:01, 5 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

WP:LEAD
  • This is suppose to summarize the article. I find the quotes to be malplaced here. They should be in the main body and summarized here.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 05:11, 8 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
    • The quotes are good. They say what makes this film most noteworthy, says what we would want someone to say and it appears in the words of the central artist involved. No better summary of the importance of the film is ever likely to appear. --Ring Cinema (talk) 17:28, 12 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
      • The quotes may be great summaries of the film, but the WP:LEAD is suppose to be a summary of the main body of the article. What in the main body of the article are these summarizing?--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 19:08, 20 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • I don't feel the article is summarized well. Please make sure that each major section is summarized in the LEAD.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 05:11, 8 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
This isn't a good criticism. The lede isn't there to reduce later sections by 90% or something. As an overview of the subject, the lede is good, and many editors seem to agree. --Ring Cinema (talk) 12:26, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
I just went back and reread WP:LEAD. There is a "Relative emphasis" section that says quotations are an exception to the LEAD summarizing the main body. It says "Significant information should not appear in the lead if it is not covered in the remainder of the article, although not everything in the lead must be repeated in the body of the text. Exceptions include specific facts such as quotations..." However, this does not resolve the issue in the section above that says "The lead section should briefly summarize the most important points covered in an article in such a way that it can stand on its own as a concise version of the article." In order for the lead to be a concise summary of the article, it needs to summarize each section, IMO.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 15:48, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
I wish I could agree. The lede summarizes the article very well as it is, mentioning the most important participants and circumstances surrounding the making of the film that are then taken up in more detail later. Everything that appears below the lede doesn't need to be mentioned in the lede. That would be bad writing and encourage the promotion of trivial material to a main point, as we have already seen. --Ring Cinema (talk) 16:34, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

Could do many things that would not improve the article. Brevity is a virtue. --Ring Cinema (talk) 16:36, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

Where do we list our objections to the reviewers opinions? --Ring Cinema (talk) 05:52, 12 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Feel free to respond to individual line items in a subsequent line or respond at the bottom to larger scale issues.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 06:20, 12 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Main body
  • In general, I don't have many issues with the first half of the main body. Here are a few though:
    • There are a few dozen redundant links. Please do not repeat links in the article. See WP:LASTNAME where appropriate.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 06:00, 8 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
    • There are some short paragraphs that need to be merged or expanded.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 06:00, 8 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
      •  Nnot done.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 19:32, 20 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
        • The idea of a paragraph is to group material on the same subject together. Short paragraphs are fine, long paragraphs are fine. It depends on the material. Asking for longer paragraphs is poor advice. --Ring Cinema (talk) 12:26, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
          • I think that there are about 5 paragraphs that need to be merged or expanded. I have arbitrarily chosen 350 characters as the length at which a paragraph seems too short to me. I am unable to find any part of WP:MOS that describes paragraphs. Lets just look at the paragraphs individually and see what each issue is:
            1. "It was first released on Blu-ray on January 24, 2012 alongside Allen's 1979 film Manhattan.[39] Both releases include the films' original theatrical trailer"- is an obscenely short paragraph. Can't we merge or expand this?--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 16:35, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
            2. "Since its release, other romantic comedies..." can't we merge this to the beginning of the "He says he has repeatedly..." paragraph. Then the paragraph would say it inspired a lot of things but did not result in a sequel.
            3. 1st and last paragraph of the plot - Please reevaluate and consider merging or expanding.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 16:35, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
            4. last two paragraphs of production - Please reevaluate and consider merging or expanding.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 16:35, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
            5. Middle paragraph of Style and technique - Please reevaluate and consider merging or expanding.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 16:35, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

Actually, a paragraph consists of material that covers roughly the same topic. For that reason, some paragraphs are long and some are short. There is definitely no number of characters at which a well written paragraph that imparts information to the reader becomes too short. The only reason to merge paragraphs -- the only reason -- is that they cover the same topic. Checking the web for a couple minutes you will find this: "A paragraph is a group of sentences that fleshes out a single idea." "A paragraph is a group of sentences that develop a single point, idea or topic." "A group of closely related sentences that develop a central idea." That is what a paragraph is. --Ring Cinema (talk) 16:44, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

I checked the five paragraphs you mention. They're all good. In fact, your bad advice has made the plot summary more difficult to understand. I will try to correct that. --Ring Cinema (talk) 16:47, 27 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Release
Images
I tried adding it but it came up as a red link.♦ Dr. Blofeld 14:31, 1 March 2014 (UTC)Reply
My apologies. That template only exists on commons. You can't do it for the Keaton one which is just a fair use image at WP. Go to the commons page rather than the WP page for the Allen pic.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 15:11, 1 March 2014 (UTC)Reply
Strong recommend withdrawing this for the time being. It needs a fair bit of work and this has become a stale nom. Fail it @TonyTheTiger: if you have to.♦ Dr. Blofeld 10:11, 4 March 2014 (UTC)Reply