Wikipedia:Reference desk/Archives/Miscellaneous/2018 March 8
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March 8
editMan who impregnates unwilling women on purpose
editHi, I have a friend who keeps bragging about how he has sex with many women in Asia and how in never used condoms and who "silently" ejaculate inside them in order to make them pregnant. He seems to be proud of it even if he probably ruined the lives of many women. Specially when you consider that an Asian women with a white/Asian kid could be rejected from her family. What could we possibly do to make him realize this is bad? The guy will go on holiday this summer and even though I will never meet his next "victims", it sickens me to know that some women will have their life ruined a few months from now. 2001:EE0:4041:7C8A:E87C:4294:B574:CC7 (talk) 17:02, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- See the articles titled rape and sexual assault for some background on the problem. However, there's no way for us to answer your question "What could we possibly do to make him realize this is bad?" Answering questions like that is outside of the purpose of this forum. --Jayron32 17:05, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- I wonder whether we are being trolled but if it's serious then I guess from "silently" ejaculate that the women consent to intercourse but the man falsely claims he will not ejaculate in them. I don't know whether such a lie is illegal in any countries but it's certainly immoral. The withdrawal method is unreliable even if a man honestly tries to use it. PrimeHunter (talk) 18:05, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Again, I don't think we need to interpret that deeply the OP's meaning. The word "unwilling" is pretty clear and unambiguous.--Jayron32 18:40, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- I wonder whether we are being trolled but if it's serious then I guess from "silently" ejaculate that the women consent to intercourse but the man falsely claims he will not ejaculate in them. I don't know whether such a lie is illegal in any countries but it's certainly immoral. The withdrawal method is unreliable even if a man honestly tries to use it. PrimeHunter (talk) 18:05, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Choose your friends wisely. They should hold the same values as you. Try this – dump him! He may comes back saying but you're my best-est friend, etc. and he starts making you feel guilty. Then remember, true friends don't do this. He is psychologically trying to manipulate you. Confided with a trusted relative. If they are older they will know of some of the tricks that false friends try. Like suddenly turning up with a really offer you can't refuse, thus placing you in emotional debt again becuase they have shown kindness – when it suits them. The fact that you haven't already walked away, is that he may already have some sort of subtle control over you that make you imagine he is a friend. --Aspro (talk) 18:32, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Hi, not a troll. I have known this guy for almost 2 years. By "unwilling", I mean they agree for sex but they don't want to get pregnant. If they heard him reaching orgasm, they would ask him to withdraw but he does it silently cause his goal is to make them pregnant. This is totally sick, I've never heard (imagined) something like that before. 2001:EE0:4041:7C8A:1D08:A5E4:52DF:51D2 (talk) 01:23, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- So this is the "give free advice" desk now? --Jayron32 18:40, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Do you mean 'Free' as in beer ? --Aspro (talk) 20:55, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Wikipedia has an article on "stealthing" at Non-consensual condom removal. Matt Deres (talk) 20:29, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Mother Nature has a way of getting back at such behavior. What are the most common STD's among women in Asia? ←Baseball Bugs What's up, Doc? carrots→ 21:18, 8 March 2018 (UTC)
- Neither pre-ejaculation removal nor condoms offer a 100% birth control. In fact both have a surprisingly high chance to fail. See Comparison of birth control methods. Additionally most countries, with no exception in Asia, have some legal constructs of alimony and child support, medical procedures to genetically identify the father are easy and cheap and women usually know about their pregnancy after 1-3 month so they should easily be able to identify the father. If the father is an european or american its likely even worse for him since laws about alimony and child support in his home state are even more supportive for women and there usually isnt any paragraph excluding foreign mothers and children from opening a lawsuit, which i think is absolutely fair. So best thing you can/should probably do is ask your stupid friend every time you see him if he is still without alimony lawsuit.
- Besides some women allegedly even "hunt" for sperm like in the case between Boris Becker and the Russian model Angela Ermakova, who surprised him with a daughter and a connected lawsuit, which she of course eventually won. --Kharon (talk) 03:09, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- Pink unicorns are as common as child support in the Philippines. It's a non existent thing. I would say that 10% of all the women are single moms before the age of 25 with absolutely no child support even if they know the father. 2001:EE0:4041:7C8A:7460:50EA:20B9:CE09 (talk) 07:31, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- You initially mentioned (cite) "Asian women with a white/Asian kid" and "sex with many women". Sounded like the male was a western sex tourist. These can be sued in their home country and most western countries have very mother/child-supportive laws that leave the father almost no chance to "bail out". --Kharon (talk) 09:42, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- I think you're seriously overestimating how easy it is for the average random woman in some random probably developing Asian country to sue some random dude in some other country who she may not even know the name of, let alone where they come from. (Note that 'easy' doesn't just refer to technical barriers but all the myriad of things that come up including knowing that it's possible, knowing how to even begin, finding someone who is at all interested in helping probably for a no real initial fee etc etc etc.) Also in a number of Western countries, parts of the for example, it's hardly unheard of for women and children living in the same juridiction as the man to be very poorly supported whatever any legal decision says is supposed to happen, and you're imaging some magic where the woman living in some other country is able to magically get whatever the court orders all the time. (Our Child support in the United States#Deadbeat parents article has some details. As that mentions, one of the reasons why the stats are so bad is likely because the parent is simply unable to pay. The 'friend' here would probably not fall into the very low end of the financial scale since people of those means can't generally go around Asia impregnating women. Although the cost of travel nowadays means they don't have to be that rich either.) Nil Einne (talk) 14:43, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- I did not write anything about an easy legal process. I just wrote it is easy to identify a father today. Also i didnt estimate, i even pointed to a famous real case (Boris Becker) that showed it may take some years to make the case and even when the male was tricked into fatherhood to win the case in favor of the woman and child. Didnt even made a difference that Mr. Becker hired some famously cunning lawyers to defend him. He lost and he never had a chance. --Kharon (talk) 16:06, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- There's obviously a very big difference between a famous person (who clearly doesn't meet my 'random dude' remark) and a Russian model living in the UK (who clearly doesn't meet my 'random woman' remark). The conditions for both as so different to be worthless in considering the likelihood of anything happening. (Amongst other things, even if we ignore the difficulty for Boris Becker to avoid court ordered child support given that he is a rich famous person, there's no real evidence he wanted to. He may have denied paternity at first, but he also later obtained joint custody. And his later statements also suggest he wasn't intending to ignore the child, whatever flaws in his initial response and in the encounter itself. In fact, was there even a court order involve for the child support or was it settled out of court?) Also, you clearly implied that this was something that might actually happen. In reality, as both me and the IP have said, the chance of it actually happening in the case the OP outlined which appears to be just some random dude allegedly sleeping with a bunch of random women in Asia, is so close to zero that it isn't worth mentioning. Frankly the OP's friend should probably be more worried about being infected with HIV or doing this to the wrong person and finding themselves the victim of violent revenge. Nil Einne (talk) 16:56, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- I did not write anything about an easy legal process. I just wrote it is easy to identify a father today. Also i didnt estimate, i even pointed to a famous real case (Boris Becker) that showed it may take some years to make the case and even when the male was tricked into fatherhood to win the case in favor of the woman and child. Didnt even made a difference that Mr. Becker hired some famously cunning lawyers to defend him. He lost and he never had a chance. --Kharon (talk) 16:06, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- I think you're seriously overestimating how easy it is for the average random woman in some random probably developing Asian country to sue some random dude in some other country who she may not even know the name of, let alone where they come from. (Note that 'easy' doesn't just refer to technical barriers but all the myriad of things that come up including knowing that it's possible, knowing how to even begin, finding someone who is at all interested in helping probably for a no real initial fee etc etc etc.) Also in a number of Western countries, parts of the for example, it's hardly unheard of for women and children living in the same juridiction as the man to be very poorly supported whatever any legal decision says is supposed to happen, and you're imaging some magic where the woman living in some other country is able to magically get whatever the court orders all the time. (Our Child support in the United States#Deadbeat parents article has some details. As that mentions, one of the reasons why the stats are so bad is likely because the parent is simply unable to pay. The 'friend' here would probably not fall into the very low end of the financial scale since people of those means can't generally go around Asia impregnating women. Although the cost of travel nowadays means they don't have to be that rich either.) Nil Einne (talk) 14:43, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- You initially mentioned (cite) "Asian women with a white/Asian kid" and "sex with many women". Sounded like the male was a western sex tourist. These can be sued in their home country and most western countries have very mother/child-supportive laws that leave the father almost no chance to "bail out". --Kharon (talk) 09:42, 9 March 2018 (UTC)
- Pink unicorns are as common as child support in the Philippines. It's a non existent thing. I would say that 10% of all the women are single moms before the age of 25 with absolutely no child support even if they know the father. 2001:EE0:4041:7C8A:7460:50EA:20B9:CE09 (talk) 07:31, 9 March 2018 (UTC)