Wikipedia:Peer review/Zrinski Bridge/archive1

Zrinski Bridge edit

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to find out how to improve it before a GAN.

Thanks, Tomobe03 (talk) 23:00, 17 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Finetooth comments: Thanks for your work on this informative article. Here are suggestions for further improvement.

  • No dead links.
  • No dabs.
  • Image license looks good.
  • Looking at bridge articles that are rated GA or FA might give you some additional ideas. You'll find a few bridge articles among the FAs at WP:FA#Geography and places, though they all seem to be about much older structures than this bridge. You'll also find bridge articles at WP:GA/ET, such as Nordhordland Bridge.

Possibilities for expansion

  • Adding a locator map like the one in the infobox of Limyra Bridge would be helpful to readers unfamiliar with eastern European geography.
  • The bridge is quite new and therefore doesn't have a long history. However, it would be interesting to know how people crossed the river before this particular bridge was finished. Did this bridge replace an older one? Did people get across the river on a ferry? Did they have to drive to a different place to get across the river?
  • I think the article needs to include at least one image of the bridge. The border-crossing image is OK to include, but it does not show the bridge.

Prose and style issues

  • I would consider moving the History section to the top of the article, just below the lead.
  • The prose would be tighter if you changed passive-voice constructions to active voice. Two examples from the lead are: "The cost was shared equally by Croatia and Hungary. The bridge is maintained by Hrvatske autoceste and Állami Autópálya Kezelő Zrt." Better would be: "Croatia and Hungary shared the cost. Hrvatske autoceste and Állami Autópálya Kezelő Zrt maintain the bridge." The article has many passive constructions similar to these two. I think that rewriting 30 or so of these would be the biggest single thing you could do to improve the prose. Instead of "A was done by B", recast as "B did A". After you do this, you might need to combine a few of the short punchy sentences to avoid choppiness, but that's OK.
  • "a joint border checkpoint is located north of the bridge" - This appears in the second sentence of the lead. For non-European readers, it would be good to add "in Hungary" after "bridge".
  • Check to make sure all of the secondary units in the conversions to imperial measures are abbreviated. The primary units should be spelled out, but the secondary units should be abbreviated. In the existing article, some are and some aren't.
  • "Volume of traffic using the Zrinski Bridge/Zrínyi Bridge is not reported regularly by Hrvatske ceste in their annual bulletins on Croatian road traffic volume, even though it is a part of the A4 motorway where the traffic volume is normally measured." - To avoid repeating "volume" three times, I'd just delete the second one, leaving " ...annual bulletins on Croatian road traffic... ".
  • I would unlink Hrvatske autoceste in the History section (unless you move the History section up). The term is already linked in the lead and in the "Traffic volume" subsection. Generally once in the lead and once on first use in the main text is sufficient, especially in an article this short.
  • "Tvornica Betonskih Stupova - TBS" - If TBS is the abbreviation, the correct format is this: Tvornica Betonskih Stupova (TBS).
  • Change the all-caps titles in the citations to Wikipedia house style; e.g., Road Network in citation 14.
  • Use consistent date formatting in the citations. Most are like "5 October 2011", but some are like "July 29, 2011". The former looks like the right choice for Hungary and Croatia.
  • I would consider moving the image of the border crossing down slightly to avoid displacing the subhead. Or eliminate the subhead. That might be even better.
  • Please make sure that the existing text includes no copyright violations, plagiarism, or close paraphrasing. For more information on this please see Wikipedia:Wikipedia_Signpost/2009-04-13/Dispatches. (This is a general warning given in view of previous problems that have risen over copyvios.)

I hope these suggestions prove helpful. If so, please consider commenting on any other article at WP:PR. I don't usually watch the PR archives or make follow-up comments. If my suggestions are unclear, please ping me on my talk page. Finetooth (talk) 01:32, 25 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for reviewing the article. Your comments are helpful and I appreciate them. I plan to implement these suggestions shortly.--Tomobe03 (talk) 13:13, 25 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]