Post (Björk album) edit
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Hi! I recently worked on the article for Vespertine and I succeeded in it becoming a Good Article. A peer review of the Post article would be appreciated. Kind regards, Bleff (talk) 13:31, 10 July 2016 (UTC)
- Comments from Laser brain
- Taking a look now! --Laser brain (talk) 16:39, 20 July 2016 (UTC)
Lead
- "Moreover, Björk co-produced every song on the album." Suggests she did not do so on previous albums. Is that correct?
- In Debut, she only co-produced "Like Someone in Love", and produced "The Anchor Song" solely by herself. The rest was produced by Nellee Hooper.
- I see a mix of spaced and unspaced em dashes, along with at least one em dash followed by a colon. Please review style guidelines at WP:EMDASH.
- I spaced every dash. You mean comma instead of colon?
- No you're using the dashes wrong. Em dashes are never spaced, and should never be followed by other punctuation.
--Laser brain (talk) 12:51, 26 July 2016 (UTC)
- "the album is considered an important exponent of art pop, avant-pop and experimental pop." Art pop seems supported here, but you're suggesting the album is an important exponent of each of these genres. You mention avant-pop only once in the body, and the source given calls the album an "avant-pop wonderland" in the title only. That genre is neither defined nor mentioned in the cited article. I'm not too much of a stickler for genres, but you want to limit the ammunition you give genre warriors to argue with.
- Fixed
- Don't hypenate "fast-pace" unless using it as an adjective like "fast-paced".
- Fixed
- "The clips that accompanied every single heavily aided Björk's success" I'm not sure what you mean here by "clips". Do you mean music videos?
- I wrote "clips" so as to not repeat the words "music video" in the sentence. I rewrote it to avoid confusions.
Back with more later. --Laser brain (talk) 17:25, 20 July 2016 (UTC)
Background and production
- "Björk's embracement of England's dance culture also extended to her looks, with her style at the time now considered representative of 1990s acid house fashion." In constructions like this, you don't need the "with", and "now" seems odd. Try: "Björk's embracement of England's dance culture also extended to her looks, her style at the time considered representative of 1990s acid house fashion."
- Fixed
- "Although One Little Indian estimated that Debut would sell a total of 40,000 copies worldwide" I don't think "a total of" is adding any additional meaning to the sentence here.
- Fixed
- "American critics were nonplussed by its lack of rock content" I'm not sure what you mean by this. Why would they be expecting it to be a rock record? I checked the citation provided and it doesn't mention rock music. It reads "American writers didn’t know what to make of the sound of Debut when it came out" but I'm not sure how you interpreted that the way you did.
- Because of her previous band output, which was post-punk and alt-rock. I changed the sentence.
- "creatively autonomous fashion" I'm not sure what this means.
- Björk saw Debut as a way to release her compositions from the past ten years, for the first time as a solo artist and with her own singular vision and identity, in contrast with her band work.
- "The picturesque locale inspired the singer to meld the recording process with the exotic natural environment." Phrases like this can be difficult to paraphrase and keep enough distance from the Pytlik book. If you take this to WP:FAC, be prepared to provide some access to pages from the book so it the article can be checked for close paraphrasing.
- Ok, thanks. Luckily, the pages are available at Google Books.
- Remember that quotation marks within quotes need to be single, not double. --Laser brain (talk) 13:24, 26 July 2016 (UTC)
- Song titles as well?