Wikipedia:Peer review/Osama bin Laden/archive3

Previous peer review

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because the article is very nearly GA status and needs just a little bit ironing out to list it. I would like to have those bits sorted out so the article can be nominated.

P.S. I know referencing is a problem but I am myself inexperienced to tackle that problem. If anyone can come forward to help and guide, it will be great.

Thanks, TheOriginalSoni (talk) 14:50, 6 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I can do this one. I'll post some initial comments; and can add more later. --Noleander (talk) 03:25, 18 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]

  Doing...

Comments from Noleander
  • The section "Activities and whereabouts after the September 11 attacks" has a large number of bullet points. Prose (paragraphs) is preferred. Try to convert to paragraphs.
  • Citations: for Good Article status, it is not required that every single fact have a footnote: but for an article of this import, each paragraph should have at least one at the end. For instance: the first 2 paragraphs in thee Name section.
  • Images: Ample images to meet GA criteria.
  • Another paragr that needs at least one citation is "Identified motivations of the September 11 attacks ...". Just grab the best cites from Motives for the September 11 attacks article (but read WP:SAYWHEREYOUGOTIT.
  • Sidebar "FBI Ten Most Wanted Fugitives" needs a citation giving the source of all those facts.
  • Citation needed for "Years later, on October 10, 2001, ..." paragraph.
  • Two sections should be merged: "Pursuit by the United States" and "Activities and whereabouts after the September 11 attacks". They both overlap tremendously, and cover the same era: 2001 to 2011. The "Activities" section is lazy: it is just a list - for an encyclopedia article, it should be interwoven with "pursuit" information. This consolidated section could have subsections on "pursuit by US under Bush admin" etc, but they need to be merged.
  • The "Death" section has a {{main}} template right in the middle of the section "Main article: Allegations of support system ...". That looks ugly. Move it up to top of the Death section. Use "See also" template if two main templates adjacent is too puzzling.
  • The prior Peer Review at Wikipedia:Peer review/Osama bin Laden/archive2 contains a list of sentences that need citations. It looks like those have not yet been addressed. That must be done.
  • That's enough for now. I can provide more feedback after those are addressed. Overall, the article looks to be in fine shape: rather comprehensive, tons of citations, and lots of images. Reaching GA status will be easy once the citations are provided.

End comments from Noleander. --Noleander (talk) 03:25, 18 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]