Wikipedia:Peer review/Mass Manipulation/archive1

I've listed this article for peer review because I hope to nominate this article for GA status sometime in the future. The peer review is to help me see what to improve, focus on and to see if the article is even ready for a GAN.

Thanks, Micro (Talk) 23:09, 9 January 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Hi! I'll give you some feedback, but I might have to write it over the course of a couple of days.

Lead

  • The lead has lots of important information, but I think it could be a little bit longer. Could the lead include a little bit more about the album's inspiration, style, and promotion (like the comic book)?

Background and release

  • Could you have some more info about the World Tour? How long did it last? Where did it go? Did anyone review it?
  • Again, great info. One thing to avoid, though, is citing YouTube as a source, like for the release of a single. If at all possible, I'd recommend finding an article saying that the video was released then. If there are truly no other sources with the date, though, I wouldn't seriously worry about it.

Critical reception

  • Great info; could you reduce the number of quotes, though? The 2nd sentence in the 2nd paragraph is a fragment, too.

-MoreExtra (talk)

User:MoreExtra.Thanks for the response, I have addressed most of the feedback you have listed, but I've decided to to not act on others. I have added to the lead, commenting about the inspiration, style/genre and promotion. I added more info about the tour, including where it went and who supported the tour. I only now just realised that I was using YouTube as a source. While it can be used, it could, and has, been replaced by a reliable (Mixmag) source. The quotes in the critical reception are actually pretty good compared to my other articles, it only looks like a lot because a lot of people reviewed the album (maybe I can condense it a little, I don't really know how to though). I have fixed the fragment in the 2nd sentence/2nd paragraph though. Micro (Talk) 04:07, 24 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Micro. Those changes look great! I have just 2 more suggestions, but I don't think they're very necessary: 1) You could add a "Chart performance" or "Commercial performance" section saying how many weeks the album spent on the charts, if it was the highest-peaking Rezz release on any of those charts, etc. -- and any sales figures, if available. If none of that is available, though, I think the "Charts" section you have covers it well... and 2) You could add a "Credits" section if anyone other than Rezz would be listed. Then again, I peeked at AllMusic, and they don't have any additional credits for the album, so again, this probably isn't necessary.
I found 2 more articles (from Billboard) on the album that you might be able to use:

I hope this helps! Great luck with the GA process! -MoreExtra (talk)

User:MoreExtra. Thanks for the feedback, however I can't seem to find anything regarding sales for the album because it didn't go gold or platinum (or whatever those are called) so no one reported on it. I think I could do a little thing about it in the billboard charts, but I only found two references (one of them you have linked) and they only briefly mention the album charting and I don't think there is enough content to make a full section (like this article). As much as I would like to add a credits/personnel bit, I don't think I can because I think there were no additional producers other than Rezz, because I can't find anything on any other site regarding credits. Either that or the credits can be found on the CD / Vinyl (physical) copies of the album, but that would require me or some other person to own the actual vinyl or CD, and that depends if the physical releases even have credits. At least I can put the references you have linked to use. Micro (Talk) 23:30, 24 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Micro I found one more article that might help: Billboard named "Drugs," from the album, one of the 50 best dance songs of 2017 -- could that help with Critical Reception? https://www.billboard.com/articles/news/dance/8070603/best-dance-electronic-songs-2017 -MoreExtra (talk)
User:MoreExtra. It absolutley could. Maybe not byitself, but I could add in a "_ song has been called one of the best dance / electronic songs of 2017" paragraph in the critical reception. I would only have to find a couple more references that do something similar to this. Micro (Talk) 03:29, 26 February 2019 (UTC)[reply]