Wikipedia:Peer review/Irfan Pathan/archive1

Irfan Pathan edit

Yes, the 2007 Cricket World Cup is coming up, Pathan will be playing, and this article is currently GA and throughly covers his career I think. It's a pity that there are no free pics of him so that it could be put on the main page during the World Cup if it passed FA, but I may as well solicit feedback anyway since WikiProject Cricket is on a big FA drive. Blnguyen (bananabucket) 05:21, 22 February 2007 (UTC)[reply]

  • "After opening both the batting and bowling in late 2005 and early 2006, Pathan was dropped from the team in both Test and ODI forms of the game." - this doesn't mention that he's back in the team
  • "Pathan made his first-class debut in the 2000-01 season, after fellow left-arm paceman Zaheer Khan was selected for the national team, helping Baroda to win the Ranji Trophy." - confusing. maybe something like:
"Pathan made his first-class debut for Baroda in the 2000-01 season, after fellow left-arm paceman Zaheer Khan left to join the national team, and helped them to win the Ranji Trophy."
  • "Pathan further honed his bowling at the MRF Pace Foundation in Chennai, after being selected by Indian selector Kiran More." - selected? for what? AFAIK, you don't need to be selected for the academy, especially not by the Indian national team selector.
  • "...where he was the leading wicket-taker with 18, more than twice that of the second leading wicket-taker." - "second leading wicket-taker" sounds wrong.
  • "...Pathan was the leading wicket-taker with 16 wickets at 31." - at 31...? economy rate?
    • "He also took eight wickets at 17.8 in three ODIs..."
    • "...leading wicket-taker with 14 wickets at 16.28..."
    • "...five wickets at an average of 9."
    • "...18 wickets at 11.88..."
    • "...taking only six wickets at 68.33..."
    • "...ten wickets at 16.1..."'
    • "...21 wickets at 11.29..."
    • "...ten wickets at 25.6..."
    • "...seven wickets at 26..."
    • "...nine wickets at 18.88..."
    • "...eight wickets at 39.37 and scoring 121 runs at 24.2..."
    • "...eleven wickets at 15.63 including 4/51 at Goa and 123 runs at 41..."
    • "...24 runs at 6 and 6 wickets at 29.83..."
    • "...taking wickets at an average of 41.33."
    • "..scored 560 runs at 35..."
  • "Pathan continued his batting improvement with a defiant 31 and 55, his first half-century after the specialist batsmen had failed in the First Test against Australia in October 2004 in Bangalore, but his career was put on hold after he suffered a side strain in the following Test in Chennai, causing him to miss the Tests in Nagpur and Mumbai." - not smooth, consider breaking into 2 sentences
  • "Former India paceman Javagal Srinath..." - I'm not to sure about this one. should it be "Indian"?
  • "These concerns were further magnified in late 2006, when Pathan was demoted from the position of an opening bowler in ODIs during the 2006 ICC Champions Trophy, and was dropped from some matches altogether and again was limited to sporadic ODI appearances on the November ODI tour to South Africa." - 2 ands, break into 2 sentences or more.
  • "He subsequently fell out of the Top 10 of the ICC bowling rankings and the Top 5 of the All rounder rankings after having spent the previous year in the list." - at what positions? Please mention in the previous section (I assume "the previous year" would mean 2005; state explicitly anyways)
  • "Despite top scoring in both innings of a first-class warm-up match in Potchefstroom whilst many specialist batsmen failed to cope with the bouncy conditions, selectors overlooked Pathan for the First Test in Johannesburg." - when? November 2006? There is a serious overall lack of dating of events in the article. Where the months have been given the year has not. Yes, most readers can make out by reading 4-5 lines above (in most cases), but this article is not ready to be FA till this concern has been cleared up, and the events' timeline easy to comprehend.
    • Please note that I have not given all of the instances where such a problem occurs. You will have to go through the article with a fine-tooth comb and clear it up of this problem.
  • "After a poor bowling display in the subsequent tour match in which he conceded 74 runs in 11 overs..." - what tour? another problem is lack of detail.
    • Please note that I have not given all of the instances where such a problem occurs. You will have to go through the article with a fine-tooth comb and clear it up of this problem.
--May the Force be with you! Shreshth91 05:55, 23 February 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • See my comments to Dinesh Karthik. Applies to this too. =Nichalp «Talk»= 07:53, 25 February 2007 (UTC)[reply]