Wikipedia:Peer review/Hell on Wheels (song)/archive1

Hell on Wheels (song) edit

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… I want to see if it is written well and has all the possible criteria for a GA nomination.

Thanks, Kekkomereq4 (talk) 19:10, 31 December 2009 (UTC)[reply]

I removed the semi-automated peer review (SAPR) because it should not be included here for the following reasons: 1) when the SAPR is included here, this peer review request does not show up at WP:PR for others to see it and make comments; 2) this saves space at WP:PR; and 3) this follows the directions above, i.e. "Please do not ... paste in semi-automated peer reviews below: link to them instead." Thanks, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 05:19, 5 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Finetooth comments: Sorry. This is not close to being ready for GAN. The main problem is the error-ridden prose. You have the beginning of a decent article here. However, errors like the oft-repeated misspelling of "groupie" as "grupie" is puzzling, particularly when the album cover spells it correctly.   Done I've fix that. Kekkomereq4 (talk) 20:59, 14 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]

  • The article badly needs copyediting. For example, in the first paragraph of the lead, you write, "The song was also added at the "Roller Boogie" soundtrack in 1979." I think you must mean "to" rather than "at". The first sentence of the second paragraph of the lead says "calling that a roller-disco anthem" when you mean "calling it a roller-disco album". The next sentence repeats "promotional", "promote". The following sentence says, "Cher, after the released of the promotional film began making music videos" when you mean "release". I see small errors like this throughout the article. You might be able to find a copyeditor in the list at WP:PRV who would be willing to help you improve the prose, spelling, and grammar.
  • Four fair-use images and sound tracks may be too many. Are they all necessary for a reader to understand the material? The lead image is fine, and you might make a case for the sound clip, but the other two images don't add anything essential that the first image lacks. They can easily be replaced by words.   Done Kekkomereq4 (talk) 21:34, 21 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • The first paragraph of the Music video section is interesting but unsourced. Who says that the video for Hell on Wheels was tough for Cher to shoot?

I hope these comments prove helpful. Finetooth (talk) 04:49, 6 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]