Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Stuyvesant High School/archive1
Stuyvesant High School edit
This is an exemplary school article which apparently has been nominated before as a FAC but I cannot find any record of prior discussion. In any case, I would like to resubmit this as a candidate to become a featured article on Wikipedia. (Support) Bahn Mi 07:11, 25 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Object. No reference section. Also, convert those external links to footnotes; in the current form they are utterly useless if the document is printed, or if the linked documents are no longer available or moved to another URL. However, I have to say I am quite impressed with the article; it really establishes the school's notability, and is way above the average high school article. Phils 07:29, 25 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Comment. If this article gets references I'll support. It is the best high school article I have seen and better than most university articles. Falphin 16:35, 25 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Support this looks good, frankly the complaining about references is a weak objection since there are about 100 external links used to back up claims and 23 inline links to references. ALKIVAR™
21:33, 25 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Support, there are rarely articles this good on high schools. File:PhoenixSuns 100.pngPhoenix2File:Teamflag1.png 21:49, 25 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Support. There are quite a few Stuy alumni on Wikipedia, and we try to keep these pages informative and relevant. If there are hoops to get through, we'll nurse it through them. RossPatterson, Stuyvesant '76
- Object. Call me a killjoy, but I dislike the cosy touches: the nickname right in the first sentence, the humorous claim that the building is sinking, the old prank made obsolete by the swimming pool. The combined effect of them is of an angle, a "voice", behind the article, and a little nostalgia and self-satisfaction in the voice—probably very justified, but still not ideal here. The extremely detailed description in the "History" section of the new building and its present-day use adds to the impression: "large glass [yeah..?] windows", "computers for work or play", "a popular hangout", "hundreds of square feet of carpet for sitting and socializing", "being caught in the elevator without a pass guarantees one a trip to the dean", "when the escalators do break down, groans can be heard as Stuyvesant students grudgingly clamber up the steps". Such things sound a little too ordinary to mention, and too warm and proud and cosy. Cool down the style of the new building description and shorten it, please. Btw, there is an interesting critical perspective on the school demographics in the spin-off "main article" Stuyvesant High School student body. I think it's a pity that no suggestion of it has survived into the summary section "Student body"—I realize it's a short summary, but a sentence or two about the criticism would be great for perspective. Apart from these points, I agree that the article is very good, and I will support if they're addressed. Even if they're not, I'm prepared to withdraw my objection, since all the other voters seem to like the article's temperature, provided somebody puts up a good argument for why I'm wrong and sour. Bishonen | talk 03:54, 26 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Pruned some of the nostalgic invisible voice from the history and added criticism on the student body User
- Object: I must say that the tone of the writing, and the specific language of it, really does read like a tri-fold brochure that would be handed out by the admissions folks at Stuyvesant. Once upon a time, I wrote things like that for St. David's School, and sentences like "it became obvious that the building was too small" sound like the wording we use for parents and donors, not encyclopedia articles (as there is an implicit 1st person POV in there). There are grammatical errors as well: "there has been allegations" and "obsoleting" a joke. Stuyvesent is one of the great schools, but I do think that it's overlong for having no references (i.e. something this long really can't go without references) and it's promotional in its tone. If school-generated materials were used in the preparation of the article, they really should be cited. Geogre 13:10, 26 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Object: References are needed. The "Notable Alumni" section consists of just a link. "While Stuyvesant accepts students purely on their academic merit" puts a POV accross that the allegations that there's a bias are unfounded. -- Joolz 13:20, 26 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Object:Strange adjectives "accomplished alumni" in what way are these people accomplished do they play the piano, arrange flowers, and sing in French? In what way are the academics "rigorous"? Links within the text should be footnoted. The two lined paragraph "In the late 1980s and early 1990s, Stuyvesant was struck particularly hard by the AIDS epidemic, with at least four teachers dying from that disease." strikes me as odd. Why "particularly"? Are all American schools losing staff frequently in this way? What is the significance of the paragraph, were the parents concerned? Or was it just the staffing shortage that was the problem? I've no idea what a PSAL pool is, and the prank doe not seem that prankish to me. I think this needs a huge re-write, and of course some references. Giano | talk 14:46, 26 Jun 2005 (UTC)
- Support- this article is an exemplary example of wikipedia's collaborative effort, it is concise, referenced, and very rich in information abulanov