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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Boy Scouts of America/archive2

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by User:SandyGeorgia 21:59, 26 July 2008 [1].

Boy Scouts of America

edit
Nominator: --—— Gadget850 (Ed)
previous FAC

Self-nominator --—— Gadget850 (Ed) talk - 12:10, 28 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Restart, old nom. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 15:48, 19 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • 'Units are led entirely by volunteers, supported by local councils using both paid professionals and volunteers." - comma -> "and"?
  • "The YMCA was an early promoter of social welfare and other reforms involving young men that focused on programs of mental, physical, social and religious development." could be better phrased as "The YMCA was an early promoter of reforms involving young men, such as social welfare, that focused in programs of mental, physical, social and religious development." The former could be misread more easily, methinks.
  • Does the MOS have anything on U.S. versus US? Seems to me that every other acronym in the article is sans periods.
  • "the Woodcraft Indians started by Ernest Thompson Seton in 1902,[7] and the Sons of Daniel Boone founded by Daniel Carter Beard in 1905." - why the serial comma? It's only two items in a list.
  • "Several small local Scouting programs for boys started independently in the U.S. soon after— most of these later merged with the BSA after it was formed." - is the "after it was formed" really necessary? It's fairly obvious that it couldn't merge with anything before it came into existence.
  • '"... to teach [boys] patriotism, courage, self-reliance, and kindred values ..."' - I'm fairly sure the ellipses after the phrase aren't needed. Additionally, the other two quotes don't have ellipses before them, either, and I'm fairly sure consistency should be maintained.
  • "Later, in 1937, Deputy Chief Scout Executive George J. Fisher expressed the BSA's mission, "Each generation as it comes to maturity has no more important duty than that of teaching high ideals and proper behavior to the generation which follows"" - should the comma after "mission" not be a semicolon?
  • "These policies are controversial and are considered by some to be unfair." - the reference is to an organisation which considers exactly that. "Some" is vague and isn't really upheld by the reference.
  • "The organization's legal right to have these policies has been upheld repeatedly by both state and federal courts." - in the reference given, only three cases are described, and only one can really be described as upholding the legal right mentioned in the article.

More later, possibly. Interesting reference style, by the way. Nousernamesleft (talk) 21:40, 19 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  • Reply
    • 'Units are led entirely by volunteers, supported by local councils using both paid professionals and volunteers." - comma -> "and"?
      • Changed comma to "who are"
    • "The YMCA was an early promoter of social welfare and other reforms involving young men that focused on programs of mental, physical, social and religious development." could be better phrased as "The YMCA was an early promoter of reforms involving young men, such as social welfare, that focused in programs of mental, physical, social and religious development." The former could be misread more easily, methinks.
      • Changed to "The YMCA was an early promoter of reforms for young men with a focus on social welfare and programs of mental, physical, social and religious development."
    • Does the MOS have anything on U.S. versus US? Seems to me that every other acronym in the article is sans periods.
    • "the Woodcraft Indians started by Ernest Thompson Seton in 1902,[7] and the Sons of Daniel Boone founded by Daniel Carter Beard in 1905." - why the serial comma? It's only two items in a list.
      • Fixed
    • "Several small local Scouting programs for boys started independently in the U.S. soon after— most of these later merged with the BSA after it was formed." - is the "after it was formed" really necessary? It's fairly obvious that it couldn't merge with anything before it came into existence.
      • Fixed.
    • '"... to teach [boys] patriotism, courage, self-reliance, and kindred values ..."' - I'm fairly sure the ellipses after the phrase aren't needed. Additionally, the other two quotes don't have ellipses before them, either, and I'm fairly sure consistency should be maintained.
      • Fixed.
        • Comment: As this is a quotation fragment, I believe the article did comply with WP:ELLIPSES in its original version, to indicate that portions of the original quotation were omitted. Also, with regard to the Fisher quote (below), it is customary in American English to introduce the speaker's or writer's quotation with a comma (or sometimes a colon), not a semicolon. JGHowes talk - 04:49, 20 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • "Later, in 1937, Deputy Chief Scout Executive George J. Fisher expressed the BSA's mission, "Each generation as it comes to maturity has no more important duty than that of teaching high ideals and proper behavior to the generation which follows"" - should the comma after "mission" not be a semicolon?
      • Fixed.
--—— Gadget850 (Ed) talk - 02:49, 20 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment - I'm a little confused about this article still, but I think that it has improved over the course of this FAC. I still would like to have those 2007 membership figures instead of 2006. Changed to neutral, if that's possible for an FA. :) --Meldshal (§peak to me) 18:08, 20 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • Reply If you have specific concerns, please list them— if you are confused, others may be as well. I finally found the full 2007 numbers with a bit of help, so this has been updated. --—— Gadget850 (Ed) talk - 15:00, 21 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Oppose - A lot of my points on the previous FAC have not been addressed. Besides that, the final comment about their being a large amount of literature on the BSA not being included needs to be remedied. A lot of the references are primary, which isn't the best. Ottava Rima (talk) 03:25, 22 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Would you mind listing what concerns are still outstanding? I think there is some confusion over that. The BSA refs are mostly about internal organization on the BSA and BSA is pretty much the sole source for that info. — Rlevse • Talk • 10:22, 23 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Actually, its not. I would suggest you find a major university library and perform a search. Just going to WorldCat, I found these immediately: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and on and on and on. Ottava Rima (talk) 14:19, 23 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Finance has been expanded. Here are the references in my collection: Wikipedia:WikiProject Scouting/Resources. --—— Gadget850 (Ed) talk - 15:15, 23 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Addressing the specific references you listed:
  • 1- The Boy Scouts : an American adventure
In my personal library; used as a source
  • 2- On my honor: Boy Scouts and the making of American youth
Available at a local library; I checked it out again because it is relevant to improving the Impact section as recommended by other comments.
  • 3- Story of the Boy Scouts
Appears to be about Scouting in the UK
  • 4- Get off my honor : the assault on the Boy Scouts of America, Hans Zeiger
I am reluctant to use this. Zeiger is militantly pro-BSA, his columns are vitriolic and often historically inaccurate and this book is even more so. You can preview it at Google Books.[2] It might work into the Impact section, with care.
  • 5- Building character in the American boy
In my personal library; used as a source. Does an excellent job of discussing the origins and early operation of the BSA into the context of American culture of the time.
  • 6- Building a popular movement; a case study of the public relations of the Boy Scouts of America
Available online, already used it to support the statement about the progressive movement.
  • 7- Scouting for the truth : ethical culture in the Boy Scouts of America
Thesis only available from Penn State
I had already searched the University of Virgina and the James Madison University library systems; I found several items that are interesting, but have no relevance here. The best bibliography of Scouting material is at *Paxtu: The International Web Site for the History of Guiding & Scouting. --—— Gadget850 (Ed) talk - 17:11, 26 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

The Impact on American life section (I chose one randomly) needs work. Some random comments;

  • "The term "Boy Scout" is used to generally describe someone who is earnest and honest, or who helps other cheerfully; it can also be used as a pejorative, sarcastic term" - it sounds like it is used sarcastically to describe someone who is earnest and honest... is that what's intended? I think you need to distinguish to two possible uses better.
  • "Over two-thirds of all astronauts have had some type of involvement in Scouting" - seems randomly thrown in... what's it got to do with the prior sentence?
  • Indeed, the entire first paragraph is just random praise of the Scounts thrown in with very little context. I'm concerned that there is barely any negative commentary in this section.
  • "Scouts have been urged to "Do a Good Turn Daily"" - you'll need a ref for this wording (quote)
  • And how is the image in this section relevant?

—Giggy 11:44, 23 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose. --Una Smith (talk) 16:36, 24 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  1. Too much content of this article is (apparently) outside its scope. For example, content about the Scout Movement, "Scouting", and "scouting": this content should be removed or should be related directly to BSA.
  2. This article also lacks significant content that is within its scope. For example, content on the origins of BSA itself.
  3. Sources are inadequate; they are selected primarily from within BSA's own literature.
  4. POV is not neutral. This is related to the biased selection of sources.
  • Reply I am just so confused...
  • Too much content of this article is (apparently) outside its scope. For example, content about the Scout Movement, "Scouting", and "scouting": this content should be removed or should be related directly to BSA.
    • The BSA is one national movement within the broader international Scout movement. Scout Movement as such is used once; Scouting is used multiple times to refer to the BSA Scouting movement; scouting—referring to military, sports or other scouting—is never used.
  • This article also lacks significant content that is within its scope. For example, content on the origins of BSA itself.
    • Please define the missing content.
    • As a contributing editor, you added content that was later removed. If that is the issue here, then lets discuss it at Talk:Boy Scouts of America#Origins.
  • Sources are inadequate; they are selected primarily from within BSA's own literature.
    • Of 86 references, 31 are directly from the BSA. Much of this is in the organization section, as there is very little third-party material on the internal BSA organization. If this use of source material is a problem then we will remove the related content.
  • POV is not neutral. This is related to the biased selection of sources.
    • The article is intended to introduce the BSA to readers who are not familiar with the organization. If there is content that is missing, not accessible or is biased, please point it out so that we can correct it.
--—— Gadget850 (Ed) talk - 19:52, 24 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Oppose Well done in a lot of ways, but I have to agree that some things are missing. I agree both that the history section needs more on the BSA itself, and there are some neutrality concerns. For example, consider the following passage:
    • One of the more visible methods of Cub Scouting is the uniform that gives each boy a level of identity within the den, the pack and the community. The boys learn teamwork by meeting and working together in a den of eight to ten boys under adult leadership. They learn and apply the ideals codified in the Cub Scout Promise and the Law of the Pack, [30] and in the Character Connections program that develops the core values of citizenship, compassion, cooperation, courage, faith, health and fitness, honesty, perseverance, positive attitude, resourcefulness, respect and responsibility.
  • This reads like a press release straight from the BSA, and doesn't have a logical flow (how do the uniforms relate to learning teamwork or any of the other stuff?). This is one example of a problem that exists in several sections. I also agree in part with the above comment that the sourcing is not broad enough - the BSA itself and Usscouts.org (a site run by Scout leaders) are the only sources for large swathes of the article. (Also footnote 24 is missing a publisher) Tuf-Kat (talk) 02:59, 25 July 2008 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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