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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/2014 Indian Super League Final/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was archived by Ian Rose via FACBot (talk) 14:44, 29 October 2016 [1].

2014 Indian Super League Final

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Nominator(s): ArsenalFan700 (talk) 19:05, 10 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about the final of the 2014 Indian Super League season. After passing the good article review, I believe that this page has the potential to move up a level higher, to become a featured article. Inspiration taken from 2011 Lamar Hunt U.S. Open Cup Final. --ArsenalFan700 (talk) 19:05, 10 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose: Sorry about this, but I think this article is some way short of FA standard. The prose is relatively poor in places; I found several examples in the first section of the main body and many others from a quick scan through the rest of the article. Additionally, there seem to be several important details missing which I would expect to read in an article on what was presumably a showcase event. Here are a few suggestions, but these are examples only and NOT an exhaustive list. Addressing these on their own will not be enough; I think the article needs a heavy copy-edit and a bit of a rethink. Sarastro1 (talk) 23:17, 22 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

  • The lead is VERY short of details on the game, which seems to be the point of the article.
  • "is a franchise league started between IMG-Reliance and STAR Sports": I don't think "between" is the best word here. The ISL was not started between anything.
  • "make it a known name in the world of football": Not sure this is correct. A "known name" is hardly a high ideal. The source states it was created "with the aim of making the game one of the country's flagship sports and India a name to reckon with in the global arena".
  • "which started its inaugural season with eight franchises": Implies that it ended the season differently. Why not simply "had eight franchises"?
  • "acted in a round-robin format": A tournament does not "act" in a round-robin format, it uses one.
  • "The top four teams at the end of the 14-game regular season would qualify for the play-offs. The play-offs would feature a two-legged semi-final which would pit the first place team against the fourth place team, while second and third would face off against each other. The final would then be a one-legged affair at a neutral venue." Why are all the verbs in the form "would" rather than simply past tense?
  • "a one-legged affair": A little idiomatic, and "affair" is hardly the way to describe a final.
  • I would like a little more background on how the tournament itself was created, and perhaps a little more about how it was received by the players, public and press. I think for a FA, we should be including this information, briefly, on the whole tournament for background.
  • In the venue section: "It was announced," "It was reported"... Why do we need this? Why not simply state what happened?
  • "Atlético de Kolkata had the first major opportunity of the second half when Jakub Podaný crossed the ball into the box with both Baljit Sahni and Arnal looking to head it in before David James came out to catch the ball." This is a little hard to follow as there is so much in one sentence, and it will be incomprehensible to someone without a football background. (i.e. what were the players trying to do; cross the ball or catch it? Opportunity to do what?)
  • "The Kerala Blasters continued to have the most chances throughout the match, which was compounded in the last minute of regulation time when Michael Chopra had his point blank range shot saved by Apoula Edel": What was actually compounded here?
  • There seems to be a lot missing from an article about a subject like this. I would expect some comment on how the match was received. Was the attendance good or bad, better or worse than expected? How was the first final received? Was it a big occasion? Did the public get excited by the prospect? Did people enjoy the game? At no point do we mention TV coverage; who covered it? What countries? What channels? What was the audience? What was media coverage in general like?
  • The titles of articles in the references should not be in capitals (MOS:ALLCAPS) Sarastro1 (talk) 23:17, 22 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]
Honestly, this is all fair enough and what I want. I will now begin the process to hopefully get this page up to a better standard and from their we will see. Cheers. --ArsenalFan700 (talk) 06:32, 23 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Closing comment -- I think it'd be best to conduct a major copyedit away from the pressure of the FAC process so will archive this shortly. ArsenalFan, pls note that per FAC instructions you need to wait two weeks before (re)nominating this or another article for FAC. As it appears you haven't taken an article all the way to FA yet, you'd be eligible to try the new FAC mentoring scheme if you'd like. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 14:43, 29 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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