User talk:JeffreySzczecinski/sandbox

Latest comment: 9 years ago by Regretscholar in topic ALS feedback

Peer review for the Dual Process theory page: I see that you made changes for the following portions of the Dual Process theory page: added the economics section, finished the table and added habituation, and added the part on terror management and part of the table. First off, I really liked the information this group added and believed it was accurate to the best of my knowledge. I also thought that it was well organized, especially with the table added. One thing that needed work was that citations should be added to each of the sections the group worked on. I really liked the hypothetical example on the economics section. I think maybe more information could be included about what the study by Alos-Ferrer and Strack included. This could help readers follow along better with the example. I really liked the idea of a table for the terror management section to keep all of the information clear and concise. Maybe adding the words system 1 and system 2 in the table would help to keep the table easy to read without having to read the introduction before it. I also really liked the explanation for habituation. I did not see any obvious changes to be made to that section, other than adding the citation. Overall, I think this group did a great job! Snm15 (talk) 17:47, 23 April 2015 (UTC)Reply


Peer review for the Dual process theory page: Overall it was pretty good! I thought that in general the information was presented in a comprehensible, readable fashion and the organization was good. I have included thoughts about each of the three sections you added, mostly areas where clarity could be improved a bit.

Terror Management Theory and the Dual Process Model: Needs a citation for the Pyszczynski article. The use of the chart seems like a good idea; the chart is probably clearer and less tedious to read than describing all these differences as text would have been. Having said that, I would like a bit more fleshing out in the paragraph above the chart. Maybe explain a bit more what terror management theory is and what distal and proximal mean in this context. I'd also add a link to the terror management theory page somewhere in there. It was good that you connected proximal and distal defenses to systems 1 and 2. Maybe include a quick explanation of why these connect?

Dual Process and Habituation: Needs a citation for the Groves and Thompson article. Describing habituation and sensitization both as component processes of habituation is confusing, just because it’s strange to say “x and y are both parts of x”. Is "habituation" commonly used to describe both habituation and sensitization? In any case, it might help to clarify if you talk about habituation and sensitization as equal components of this dual process, and not treat habituation as the "primary" component. So I would change the heading to something like "Habituation and Sensitization as a Dual Process", change the first sentence to say "...the processes of habituation and sensitization act as a dual process..." Does that make sense? Good brief definitions of habituation and sensitization. I would definitely include links to the pages for each of them though. Stating in the last sentence that the two systems interact to help understand the world is good. I would provide a little more explanation, though. Emphasize that they allow us to focus on needed information and filter out unneeded information. Maybe incorporate an explanation of what their purposes are earlier on?

Economics: Needs a citation for the Alos-Ferrer and Strack article. Explain what multiple-selves models are, and how they relate to economic decision making. You make the connection between individual personality traits and automatic processing. Is there a similar connection between situation and controlled processing? If so, make that connection explicitly. The example of the selfish person vs. unselfish person making a selfish vs. prosocial decision is helpful. I feel like it could be presented more clearly though. Perhaps give a more concrete example of a situation? I’m unclear as to how this relates specifically to economic decision making, as opposed to decision making in general. I would make that connection. The opening paragraph of the page mentions that dual process theory relates to economics, and mentions prospect theory and behavioral economics. Do you think that either of those come into play with what you describe? I would probably take out the “We also have to consider…” and “We must conclude…” openings of the final two sentences, and reorganize them a bit. Farinasaa (talk) 01:37, 27 April 2015 (UTC)Reply

Peer Review

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Terror Management Theory Edits --I would either link the words "Terror management theory" to its wikipedia page, or give a brief definition of what that is to readers. Just so if they are not aware of what it is, they can find an explanation. --I could not find a citation for the Terror Management article you are citing. --I think it would help readers if you explained distal/ proximal defenses. I am not sure if there are definitions for them, but I think an average reader might struggle to make sense of this. --I feel like in general this portion needs a bit more elaboration. Maybe add implications? I also think some of the word choices in the table might need explanations or more simple word choices. (Although I'm not sure if this table is directly from the paper?) --I think relating these two theories is an awesome idea. It definitely helps readers to see the implications and far reach of the Dual Process Theory.

Dual Process and Habituation Edits --I would retitle this section to match the last, either "Terror Management Theory and the Dual Process Model" and "Habituation and the Dual Process Model" OR "Dual Process Model and Terror Management Theory" and "Dual Process Model and Habituation" just so this section flows a bit better in the outline section. --This also needs a citation. --I think this section would be very complicated for someone with a non-psychology background. I would define habituation before the explanation of how it relates to the dual process theory. --" the process of habituation also mimics a dual process in which two systems, the habituation process and the sensitization process, interact to create habituation"-This sentence is really confusing in particular. How do two systems interact to create one of the systems that make it up? --Overall, this section needs expansion and clarification. There are a lot of large words that would be difficult to understand, as well as a lack of context. Again, I think this section adds another great area of expansion and reach on the Dual Process Theory.

Economics Edits --This needs a citation. --I would define multiple-selves model, or add a link to that wikipedia page. --I feel like titling this section economics is a bit misleading. I would either refocus the paragraph to focus on monetary decisions, or maybe add it to the decision making section of the wikipedia page. I think this would fit great into the decision making section, and add some insight as well. --I think this section does a good job of using examples and implications that readers could understand.

Overall three areas, I think this was well done. There are some changes to be made, but overall the content added is a good expansion on a very well developed wikipedia page. Keep it up! Dinos4lyfe (talk) 01:47, 28 April 2015 (UTC)Reply

ALS feedback

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I think you've done a very nice job broadening the scope of the article. I share the reviewers' concerns that you need citations for the new papers, however-- this is a very serious omission. Additionally, in places the writing is very dense and doesn't seem accessible to a non-expert audience (i.e., a friend who's never taken a psych class), and in others it's excessively conversational ("Let's say that..."). Try for a more neutral, journalistic "happy medium", and be sure to cite your sources properly! Regretscholar (talk) 13:28, 28 April 2015 (UTC)Reply