Bubblespop9755
| This user is a student editor in University_of_Kentucky/WRD_110_Composition_and_Communication_I_(Fall_2018) . |
Welcome!
editHello, Bubblespop9755, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 16:00, 24 September 2018 (UTC)
Notes
editHi! I have some notes for you:
- Make sure that you have non-local coverage. A lot of this is local coverage, which is greatly depreciated on Wikipedia because it's assumed that a local business will get local coverage. You need more national and international coverage to really help show where the business is notable.
- This isn't promotional per se, but it is written in a fairly casual tone that could be mistaken as such depending on the reader. I've re-written the sections on products and history as an example of Wikipedia's writing.
- I don't know that there really needs to be a mention of the apparel line, since most businesses nowadays tend to sell t-shirts and the like. If there's independent coverage of the apparel line, then I'd include it, otherwise I'd remove it.
- The recognition section should only cover things like awards and honors - coverage in news media is something that is considered to be a given with a business, so it's rarely highlighted in its own section. The only time it should be highlighted is if there's a lot of non-local coverage about a piece written about the business. The mention of the Cooking Channel coverage is fine, since that's pretty major (a national show on a major channel) and there was a review of sorts for the business. Listing all of the coverage the business has received also can come across a little promotional, since it's sort of like the press page on a promotional website.
- Avoid dated terms like "recent", since that's going to become outdated as soon as new coverage comes available or as time passes. It's better to specify time periods, like "In 2018" or "On November 11, 2018".
I hope this helps! I hope this doesn't come across as too critical - I just wanted to give you some feedback. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:25, 13 November 2018 (UTC)