AlexandraHayward
Peer Review
editOverall, this article is very well done. I think that you gave a nice scope of the various effects pollution can have on animal behaviour. I like that you made an association with your topic to Tinbergen's four questions. This was a nice way to tie the topic into the class material which is a very strong asset of your article!
- Lead Section
Perhaps instead of saying "behaviours are being looked at as potential.." you could phrase it in a way to say "behaviours are found to be potential.." or "observed behaviours are used as potential..". You finished the first paragraph mentioning how behaviours are difficult to measure, perhaps you could add a phrase to say how these researchers are doing this.
- Mechanisms
I don't think you would need a dash between well and studied. I think it may also be useful to add another reference to this section or if you used the same reference for all of this information, you should make note of this to make that is clear in the paragraph.
- Applying Tinbergen's Four Questions
When explaining how the questions pertain to this subject, I noticed you start three sentences in a row using the word "question". I think it might be nice to change one or two of these words or add something in to keep a flow going between the sentences like "while or the".
- Effects on Reproductive Behaviours
One of the sentences "Guppies treated with atrazine during breeding and through gestation were less likely to engage in and showed fewer numbers of courtship displays and other reproductive behaviours, and as well, females preferred untreated males[3]." I think you could change the wording a little bit at the part "were less likely to engage in and showed fewer numbers.." as it seems a little bit redundant. I noticed there's also a few times where you had a comma before the word "and" in this paragraph in places where I don't think a comma is always necessary.
- Conservation Implications
A few of the sentences seem a little long in this section where I think they could be broken up into two sentences. For instance, this sentence here "As well, guppies from crude oil-polluted environments are less exploratory after both short-term and long-term exposure, which may weaken their foraging efficiency and resource-use diversity, thus posing a threat to the population viability[6]." You could perhaps start a second sentence where the word "thus" comes in.
Overall I think your article is very well done! My suggestions are very minor as I think you included some very good and interesting content in the article. Great job!
Nlstudent18 (talk) 20:22, 18 March 2018 (UTC)
| This user is a student editor in Memorial_University/Animal_Behaviour_(Winter) . |
Thanks so much for the thoughtful feedback! :)
Training Exercise Introduction
editHello, I'm Matt, just introducing myself as part of the training exercise. Mattdrodge (talk) 00:21, 15 January 2018 (UTC)
Welcome!
editHello, AlexandraHayward, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
I hope you enjoy editing here. If you haven't already done so, please check out the student training library, which introduces you to editing and Wikipedia's core principles. You may also want to check out the Teahouse, a community of Wikipedia editors dedicated to helping new users. Below are some resources to help you get started editing.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:42, 16 January 2018 (UTC)
Pollutant-induced abnormal behaviour
edit@AlexandraHayward and Hjd165: Nice work creating the Pollutant-induced abnormal behaviour article. I noticed that in several sections you have references in the section header. References in Wikipedia articles are supposed to be placed after the statements they support, not in the section headers. That way, readers can know which statements are supported by which reference, even if people continue to expand the article in the future. Thanks. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 03:55, 22 November 2018 (UTC)