Template:Did you know nominations/Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies

The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by PumpkinSky talk 23:13, 4 July 2012 (UTC)

Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies edit

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... that in the alternate history of Richard Schenkman's 2012 horror/action film mockbuster Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies, John Wilkes Booth is an undercover Confederate agent secreted within Lincoln's own secret service staff?

Reviewed: Psilocybe hoogshagenii
Comment: found a 67 word stub article sent to AFD. It really was not too difficult to give it a 10x expansion so the project would have a nice encyclopedic C-class film article.[1] Schmidt, ^{MICHAEL Q.}

Created/expanded by MichaelQSchmidt (talk). Self nom at 06:20, 27 June 2012 (UTC)

Comment – as of June 27, this article is still at AfD. Until this passes its AfD and the tag is removed, this article should not be promoted. No comment on the DYK criteria. Jrcla2 (talk) 15:43, 27 June 2012 (UTC)

I've closed the AfD as keep. Bencherlite ^Talk 08:43, 29 June 2012 (UTC)

The hook, at 234 characters, is far longer than DYK's maximum of 200 (including spaces). A significantly shorter alternate needs to be created. BlueMoonset (talk) 03:31, 3 July 2012 (UTC)

Opps. Try the following:

ALT 1... that in the alternate history of Richard Schenkman's 2012 mockbuster film Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies, John Wilkes Booth is a Confederate agent planted within Lincoln's secret service staff?
(196 characters) Schmidt, ^{MICHAEL Q.} 09:18, 3 July 2012 (UTC)

DYKcheck shows a 5x prose expansion to 10254 characters starting 25 June, so it qualifies in that regard. Article is sourced where appropriate (Plot and Story sections do not need sourcing). The ALT1 hook is interesting and sourced, though I think "own" isn't really necessary in an already long hook. QPQ has been satisfied. The article needs a good spelling check of names, as too many are missing letters in places: "Lincon", "Confedrate", etc. Also, the word "mixed" isn't explained at the start of the Critical response section. That section contains an unacceptable duplication in the final paragraph of "Pat Garrett, who never fought in the [civil] war"; this must be properly paraphrased. FYI, the article falls afoul of WP:OVERLINK in a big way: every time a name such as Pat Garrett or Bill Oberst Jr. is given, it's linked. The rule of thumb is in the intro and only once in the body of the article (with some exceptions for tables). Is Abe 9 or 10 when his mother dies? (Article gives both.) BlueMoonset (talk) 16:37, 4 July 2012 (UTC)

Adding: the "local civil war reenactment groups" section also strikes me as overly close paraphrasing. Please revise this as well. Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 16:49, 4 July 2012 (UTC)

The word "own" is now removed from the ALT. After I nominated for DYK, someone went through and added to the article I had thought otherwise ready, including a "story" section to supplement the "plot" section. Though I personally consider their addition too much of a spolier... out of respect for the adding editor, I have combined the two, thus also addessing spellings and overlinking. As for the age of young Lincoln, Starburst and KDVR say 10-years-old. I could find no RS saying 9-years-old. So I corrected this in my combining "Plot" and "Story" sections. Schmidt, ^{MICHAEL Q.} 21:46, 4 July 2012 (UTC)

The combined plot/story is long for a feature film: the usual range is 450 to 700 words, and this comes in at 723 words. Feel free to cut as you think appropriate; the article qualified for the 5x expansion before the new section. I did do some editing myself: the changes you made to the two places I noted as close paraphrasing were not nearly enough, in one case simply moving "never fought in the war", and in the other just adding a word or two to "added briefly to the film's production values": in such cases, you need to do major rewrites of the sentences to avoid infringement. There are also a few more typos to find, including "sythe", though the overlinking appears taken care of. BlueMoonset (talk) 23:00, 4 July 2012 (UTC)

This passes with the ALT1 hook, now 190 characters, as the issues identified above have been fixed. Congratulations! BlueMoonset (talk) 23:00, 4 July 2012 (UTC)