Talk:The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake
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Audry Hernandez - Peer Review edit
- Try to condense some of your paragraphs into bigger ones. You have a lot of really short paragraphs which is going to make it look longer.
Example: The story begins before Rose's ninth birthday. Her mother, Lane, bakes her a cake for the special occasion. Rose is aware that her mother is unhappy with her life, yet, her mother tries to convince her otherwise. When tasting the cake her mother has baked for her, she can taste the sadness and oppression in the bite. It is then that Rose realizes she is able to taste the emotions of the people who create the foods that she eats. She quickly comes to dislike this odd power as she continuously makes negative comments about the food she consumes. Her mother begins to think that she has done something wrong within her cooking. Her father is oblivious to the fact that anything is going on, per usual, and her brother believes that she has gone insane. (Also fixed minor grammatical errors, combined sentences, etc.)
- You didn't explain who Joseph was prior to mentioning him and his friend, George.
Steven S - Plot review edit
The plot summary of this book contained several inaccurate implications about the book itself (Example: When she steps back from the chair she finds that Joseph is gone. She leaves the room before she find out he is gone.)
It also did not properly explain one of the major facets of the book, Joseph's disappearances. It was only mentioned once (A couple years go by and Rose finds out that Joseph has disappeared again), even through his final disappearance is the climax of the novel. His first 3 disappearances are unmentioned, despite the use of the word "again". I also found the use of the word "metamorphosing" without context is misleading, as is describing his skill as one "to transform". The nature of the family's known skills is always to discern the hidden emotions of others through unusual means, and while the nature of Joe's skill is never explicitly named, it is implied that it is similar to those of Rose and her grandfather, just heightened to a truly unbearable extent.
Please do condense and revise as you see fit. I know I can be long winded, and my grammar isn't perfect. Stevenisinatree (talk) 02:05, 21 January 2023 (UTC)