Talk:Rachel Weisz/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 06:56, 2 February 2011 (UTC)

Please respond to my concerns at your convenience by starting a new line below each concern. I will striket my concerns as they are resolved.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 05:47, 4 February 2011 (UTC)

• I feel a bit of wanting for this subject. The article starts "Rachel Hannah Weisz . . . is an English film and theatre actress and fashion model." The article says nothing more than "During the final years in school, she started modelling." which is misspelled by the way. Is there any chance of finding any information about this part of her career? Who did she model for back then? Is she a current spokesperson for any fashion or cosmetics companies?
  •  Done I mentioned her beginnings at modeling at fourteen in Early life and background. Check out the section Personal life. I added some info about her career as a model.--Gunt50 (talk) 15:58, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
    • Why is Ambassador capitalized?--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:35, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      • sorry, I wrote it that way. It's already corrected. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Gunt50 (talk • contribs) 20:37, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
• The article talks about her roots in theatre. Has she done any theatre work since college in West End or on Broadway. A quick scan at www.ibdb.com yields an award for The Shape of Things, which is mentioned in the article. However, in the filmography section, I think theatre work should either be separated or noted in the notes column. It is difficult for the lazy reader to determine her stage work.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 05:23, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
  •  Done We already separated both sections--Gunt50 (talk) 15:58, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

• In general, I find my self looking at the various roles and thinking, was she any good at this or that. Many actor biographies start to become flush with critical commentary at about the time the quality level gets to GA. We know there are a lot of critical reviews that you are not mentioning. You may want to present those rather than just run through her roles.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:23, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

I worked on that aspect adding the critical acclaim for her oscar-winning performance in The Constant Gardener and for The Whistleblower--Gunt50 (talk) 21:54, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

• • • I guess what I am saying is that in addition to her roles for which she received elite nominations, her other roles need some critical review. If you are taking this to FAC, you will have to discuss each role more substantively in this regard. You will have to discuss modestly- and negatively-reviewed roles as well.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:23, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      • There's a confusion here. By now we're trying to take the article to GA, not FAC.--Gunt50 (talk) 00:11, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
        • I can let this pass.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 00:14, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
          • Your intentions are to take it to FA?, if you think that's possible I'll be glad to do it.--Gunt50 (talk) 00:19, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
  • I have just stumbled upon the awards section. This is good. However, there should be commentary in the theatre section regarding her critically received roles. I think it should be just like the motion picture section in this regard.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:28, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

• Why is the botox ban thing mentioned in the box and not in the article?--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 20:53, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
  • Since it was only an opinion we didn't include on the article. Instead we did include a autobiographic statement as 'I was a bad student'. --Gunt50 (talk) 21:09, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
    • Alright Champ, I give up. I added it on Personal Life --Gunt50 (talk) 22:11, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      • That would be better in a quote box. Again, see Clint Eastwood.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:18, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
        • •  Done --Gunt50 (talk) 00:07, 10 February 2011 (UTC)

WP:LEAD

• "turning finally into a wide public recognition" is an odd bit of verbiage.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 05:31, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 21:19, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

Early life and background

• I think I would break the first paragraph after identifying her family. Then have a second paragraph on her upbringing.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 05:39, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
  • I broke the paragraph. You should take a look now.--Gunt50 (talk) 14:45, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
• The role in King David, might deserve a mention if it was Bathsheba.
  • Would you translate that into Her majesty's English? --Gduwen (talk) 01:48, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
    • I am asking you to tell us what role she turned down if it was a notable one.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 03:25, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
      • I've been doing some search, but I can't find specifically which role was offered to her. The only fact named is that she turned down the role because her parents didn't agree and that also she was not sure of doing it.--Gduwen (talk) 17:26, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• In 1984 comma.
  •  Done comma added--Gunt50 (talk) 14:45, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
• offered a place at drama school, which one?
  • This is a hard point. I looked for almost EVERY online source for the drama school's name. Gduwen even looked for it on google books but we couldn't find anything. Just the mention that she turned it down.--Gunt50 (talk) 22:34, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
    • O.K.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:40, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
• In those years comma.
  •  Done coma added--Gunt50 (talk) 14:45, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
• raising career -> rising career.
  •  Done I corrected the verb--Gunt50 (talk) 14:45, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
• I don't think the comma is needed after having days.
  •  Done I erased the comma--Gunt50 (talk) 14:45, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
• Put a year in front of Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
  •  Done Year added --Gunt50 (talk) 14:53, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
• Does Cambridge Talking Tongues still exist?--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 05:46, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
  • I don't think that exists anymore, this source lists all the plays that the group did, and the last one was Hove in 93'.--Gduwen (talk) 01:48, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
    • Its last play was in 1993. I clarified it on the lead.--Gunt50 (talk) 22:00, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      • The better place for that detail is in the main body. The lead is suppose to summarize the main body, which has further details.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:37, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
        • •  Done I moved it to Early life and background. --Gunt50 (talk) 00:07, 10 February 2011 (UTC)

1992 - 1998

• I think these years need to have the hypehns changed according to WP:DASH
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
    • I don't think this is currently correct. Reread. Why spaces before and after?--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:42, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      • I took the time to correct this point. Check it out.--Gunt50 (talk) 21:25, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
• The first paragraph is one runon sentence. Chop it into three or so.
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• her following should start with capitalization
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• The last sentence of the 2nd para is runon too.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 03:28, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)

1999 - 2003

• "Her breakout" not capitalized.
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• Match tenses. Either character was and undertook or character is and undertakes.
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• Typically four hundred and thirty-three million would be 433. Also convert this into current dollars (see Bobby Orr for an example of $ conversion).
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• Same with 260 later.
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• Last sentence runon.
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
• Also clearly state US dollar, since she is not an American actress.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 03:34, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
  •  Done--Gduwen (talk) 17:02, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
    • Link on first use.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:42, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      •  Done--Gunt50 (talk) 20:47, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

2004 ‐ 2009

• Do you know which type of twin (identical or fraternal, I believe)?
  • I guess they're identical because she portrayed both. --Gduwen (talk) 00:26, 8 February 2011 (UTC)
    • Say so and link.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:45, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
      • I just did --Gunt50 (talk) 20:43, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
• You switch back and forth from played roles to plays roles. Watch your tense throughout.

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:26, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

• "The same year, she rejected the offer participate in the The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor due to script issues, The role was portrayed by Maria Bello." is runon.

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:26, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

• an Spanish, an->a--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:13, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:26, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

2010 ‐present

• The film made a woman in the crowd faint. Please tell us what the film was about then.

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 16:03, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

I would reword "the intense depiction in scenes of the treatment from the kidnappers to the victims" to "the intense depiction in scenes of the treatment of the victims by the kidnappers".--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:49, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

I just reworded it. --Gunt50 (talk) 20:43, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

Why is this set off with commas?--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 20:56, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

I erased the commas --Gunt50 (talk) 21:02, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

• which filming took place in fall 2010 -> which filmed in fall 2010

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:26, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

• Also, BBC's espionage thriller, Page 8,[58] and Fernando Meirelles' psychosexual drama 360. is a sentence with no verb.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:19, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:26, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

I would reword "Other of her" to "Her other". You will also want to tag this with {{asof}} so that this is flagged for updating.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:49, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

 Done --Gunt50 (talk) 20:51, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

Theatre

• add some critical commentary.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:28, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

Awards and honours

• No need for redundant links in an article of this length.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:28, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:41, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

• Stray text "Picture]]".--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:52, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

I erased the ]]. Was that it, champ? — Preceding unsigned comment added by Gunt50 (talk • contribs) 20:54, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

Personal life

• No need for redundant links for The Shape of Things

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:40, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

Still linked once too often in the article--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 18:52, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

I unlinked the one in the Theatre section--Gunt50 (talk) 20:58, 9 February 2011 (UTC)

• period not comma after The Shape of Things.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 23:32, 7 February 2011 (UTC)

 Done--Gduwen (talk) 00:39, 8 February 2011 (UTC)

Checklist

GA review (see here for criteria)

---

This is a quality article that is on its way to FA. In order to make it there will need to be prose expansion to give the article more than a filmography chronology feel. More critical review will be needed.

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

   Needs more critical review of roles. See Clint Eastwood or Kate Winslet, which are two I have reviewed, for example. Technically, nothing is missing from the article because the basic element of each role is put forth in an encyclopedic manner, but the reader really should be given more.

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

   Both images need {{personality rights}} tags. The latter image needs WP:CAPTION tweaking because it is not a full sentence and thus should not end with a period.

   Both are wrong now. Read WP:CAPTION#wording. If it is not a full sentence, it should not end in a period.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 01:33, 10 February 2011 (UTC)

Both are now correct.--Gduwen (talk) 01:52, 10 February 2011 (UTC)

1. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

   On hold

Additional outstanding issues

• Botox seems like a cause not mentioned.
• King David role would be nice, but we can do without.
• Which drama school made her an offer? Would be nice, but we can do without it.
• Cambridge Talking Tongues existence
• WP:DASH issues in subsections
• I have to do a final runthrough on tenses when I muster up the energy.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 21:16, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
  • Tenses seem resolved except the 2010–present section.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 00:20, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
    • Those are in past tense now. --Gunt50 (talk) 00:33, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
      • When you can get the image issues resolved and fix bare URL 84, I can pass this one.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 00:48, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
        • Ok, I added the templates, and let me know if the captions are alright now chief. --Gduwen (talk) 01:11, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
          • Ref still messed up.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 01:33, 10 February 2011 (UTC)
          • I made some fixes on that section.--Gduwen (talk) 01:43, 10 February 2011 (UTC)

Everything is looking good for WP:GA. I will pass it now. For FA you will want to add more critical commentary and of course, keep it up to date. You did well at responding. I was glad to give this one some attention.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 02:47, 10 February 2011 (UTC)