Talk:Pokémon Sword and Shield/GA1

Latest comment: 4 years ago by ShalomSir in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: David Fuchs (talk · contribs) 20:12, 14 February 2020 (UTC)Reply


Look for comments by the end of the next week. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 20:12, 14 February 2020 (UTC)Reply

This is where the fun begins. ShalomSir (talk) 03:07, 15 February 2020 (UTC)Reply
Just an update, still working on this, aiming for this week. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 19:12, 24 February 2020 (UTC)Reply
No worries, take your time. ShalomSir (talk) 03:12, 27 February 2020 (UTC)Reply

Overall, the article is pretty solid for a start, but it's got some substantial issues that have to be addressed. Comments to criteria as follows:

  • General (1,3,4,5):
    • The article needs to work a bit better as an introduction to the game. Plenty of readers aren't going to be intimately familiar with the game going in, so explaining exactly what it is in the body is sorely needed (rather than just launching into a "what's new"-type deal.) What kind of game is it? What are Pokémon Gyms? Et cetera.
    • The reception section seems pretty thin for the availability of sources, and relies a bit too much on quotes rather than structuring it around what specific elements of the game received praise or criticism.
    • launching in February 2020�—update?
  • Prose (1):
    • The Galar region begins with sprawling countryside—I'm not sure a region can really "begin" given that directions are arbitrary.
    • Things like contractions, when outside quotes, shouldn't be used as too informal ("it wouldn't release")
    • On January 9, 2020, it was announced that over 200 pre-existing Pokémon that weren't available at launch would be added to the games through free updates, to tie-in with the expansion packs.[38]—this seems redundant with the previous sections mention of the 200 figure.
  • References (2,4):
    • You've got some inconsistently-formatted references with regards to websites in italics, missing essential fields, etc.
    • Spot-checked references to current refs 1, 8, 12, 17, 19, 20, 23, 28, and 37.
      • 1: Doesn't properly cite Several new features for the games are also firsts for the series, including cooperative raid encounters, akin to those seen in Pokémon Go;
      • 8: Doesn't adequately cite gyms being missing in the previous games.
      • 12: Doesn't adequately cite Sword and Shield take place in the Galar region, a large, narrow expanse of land and one of many regions in the Pokémon world.
      • 17: An Industrial Revolution-like city with steampunk-style elements populates the center of the region. not adequately cited by [1] (doesn't mention the center of the region, and in fact seems to contradict that with the major city in the north discussed.)
      • 19: Doesn't adequately cite Like with Pokémon Sun and Moon, Pokémon previously introduced in older games, such as Weezing, gain regional Galarian Forms with new typings, stats, and appearances. Some Pokémon, such as Linoone, even gain regional evolutions (meant to cite to this?
      • 23: Doesn't adequately cite The Switch's ability to render larger Pokémon models and better show size differences between species is the root of the Dynamax feature.
    • Earwig's tool didn't flag any concerns with copyright violations; cited quotes, etc. are all that show up.
  • Media (6):
    • I don't think File:Pokémon Galar Region.jpg really meets non-free criteria as it stands. The geography of the region doesn't really factor much into understanding the article, comparing it to real places means there's less of a reason for non-free content, there's not a lot of critical commentary about it.

Given the issues with comprehensibility of the gameplay section, the thin reception section, and most especially the sourcing concerns I found via a spot-check, I'm failing the review at present. It can be renominated once the issues have been addressed. --Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 20:03, 1 March 2020 (UTC)Reply

You hate to see it happen, but it is what it is. Thanks for the feedback, I'll be sure to work on this this following week. I'll ping you if I need clarification. ShalomSir (talk) 03:03, 2 March 2020 (UTC)Reply