Talk:NJGov/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Lee Vilenski (talk · contribs) 20:57, 9 October 2022 (UTC)

Hello, I am planning on reviewing this article for GA Status, over the next couple of days. Thank you for nominating the article for GA status. I hope I will learn some new information, and that my feedback is helpful.

If nominators or editors could refrain from updating the particular section that I am updating until it is complete, I would appreciate it to remove a edit conflict. Please address concerns in the section that has been completed above (If I've raised concerns up to references, feel free to comment on things like the lede.)

I generally provide an overview of things I read through the article on a first glance. Then do a thorough sweep of the article after the feedback is addressed. After this, I will present the pass/failure. I may use strikethrough tags when concerns are met. Even if something is obvious why my concern is met, please leave a message as courtesy.

Best of luck! you can also use the {{done}} tag to state when something is addressed. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)}

Please let me know after the review is done, if you were happy with the review! Obviously this is regarding the article's quality, however, I want to be happy and civil to all, so let me know if I have done a good job, regardless of the article's outcome.

Links

Prose

Lede

• @NJGov - is the @ symbol actually a part of the account name? I thought that was just for pinging. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  removed the @ theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:42, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• Lede seems obsessed with things it's posted post-2019. Why haven't we stated when it began first? Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  two birds with one stone, added backdrop theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:52, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• "rose to popularity" - puff. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  changed to began garnering a significant follower base theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:43, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• government-run account's managers, - this is a run-on and doesn't work. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  not sure what you mean, but I did move "government-run" theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:44, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  For future reference, the previous: "government-run account" is fine and "account's manager" is fine, but otherwise it reads that the managers are government run. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 06:29, 14 October 2022 (UTC)

• tone described as "sassy" and "sharp", Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  Attribution isn't needed in a lead – can be found in the article. theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:45, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  Yes, but, by publications? Fans? Other Twitter users? Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 06:30, 14 October 2022 (UTC)

  added attribution :) theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 05:29, 17 October 2022 (UTC)

• outpacing is the wrong word for a value. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  I disagree; google says that it means to "go, rise, or improve faster than", and gives the example of "he took the pass and outpaced the defense to score in the corner". theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:46, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• Reception of @NJGov has been generally positive. - once again Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:41, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  see previous, although I could say "from media outlets". theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:45, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

General

• I completely disagree that the infobox image is fair use. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  I asked on the discord and they said it was; I couldn't quite believe it either. It might work as a logo; if not, feel free to FFD? I could see it going either way. theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:46, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  • I shall.Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 06:31, 14 October 2022 (UTC)

• Infobox mentioned Edwin Torres, lede does not. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  two birds with one stone, added Torres theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:52, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• What's with the tweet? I know this is an article on a Twitter account, but it's very much just a random witty comment. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  which one? theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:47, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• The images just say the people and where the image was taken. Have we not got anything to say about the images? Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  what do you think they're missing? theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:47, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• New Jersey Monthly writes - newspapers don't write, authors do. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  fixed theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:53, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

• The quote box really isn't needed. We can say what they wanted to do without quoting them to that extent. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  which one? theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  • • "We’re owning this brand that New Jersey already has..." Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 06:37, 14 October 2022 (UTC)

      all righty, I replaced it with prose theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 05:28, 17 October 2022 (UTC)

• As a Twitter user since the age of 13 and a 22-year-old - I'm assuming you mean that she was 22 years old, and that she had used the site since she was 13, but I don't see how the rest of the paragraph requires that you need to know this information. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:48, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  someone who's been on Twitter for 9 years and is still relatively young is more able to keep their finger on the pulse of "what's cool", is what I was trying to get at. theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:49, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

  • • I guess you could make the same commentary even if there was no mention of her being on the site for nine years. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 06:36, 14 October 2022 (UTC)

      I think the fact that they have so much experience with the site is something to speak to, actually. I have a cousin who's roughly my age, but I've had a cell phone and general access to social media for far longer. Watching them enjoy the same memes and delve into the same topics I did when I was first foraying into the internet showed me that longevity on a site can influence your ability to understand its mechanisms and tendencies as much as being in the right age demographic. theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 05:31, 17 October 2022 (UTC)

Review meta comments

• I'll begin the review as soon as I can! If you fancy returning the favour, I have a list of nominations for review at WP:GAN and WP:FAC, respectively. I'd be very grateful if you were to complete one of these if you get time. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:57, 9 October 2022 (UTC)

  Thanks, Lee Vilenski! I've made some initial fixes and replies :) theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/her) 18:53, 13 October 2022 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.