Talk:Landing at Scarlet Beach/GA1
Latest comment: 8 years ago by Parsecboy in topic Images
GA Review edit
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Reviewer: Parsecboy (talk · contribs) 12:21, 17 March 2016 (UTC)
I'll review this article. Parsecboy (talk) 12:21, 17 March 2016 (UTC)
Intro/general comments edit
- It took a bit too long to find out where this landing took place (and if I didn't know where Finschhafen was from my work on German colonial cruisers in the 1890s-1910s, I'd have had to have gone further). I'd suggest something along the lines of "... took place during the Huon Peninsula campaign fought in Papua-New Guinea in the Second World War."
- The lead section seems to be a bit too detailed. For instance, we don't need to know the specific breakdown of the Japanese air raid - I'd shorten that bit to something like "The Japanese launched a retaliatory air raid on the ships of the VII Amphibious Force, but US fighter aircraft defended the convoy and no ships were hit. Nevertheless, continued Japanese air attacks over the course of the battle inflicted numerous casualties." Of course that's just an idea of the level of detail I'd say is warranted.
- There are a number of dupe links. You might have Ucucha's tool, but if not, it's pretty useful.
Prelude edit
- Is Ultra correct? My understanding was that Ultra referred only to Enigma decrypts and that Japanese decrypts were referred to as Magic. But that could be an Americanism.
- The acronym SWPA is used but not explained, as far as I can tell.
Landing edit
- "which for reason had veered off to the right" - it seems like something is missing here.
- Specify what type of ship Conyngham was. Ditto for Reid.
- Any reason why only 115k of the 153k rounds of 9mm were dropped?
- "The extracted at 03:00..." - should that be "They"? Or is there a missing word?
- Re-worded: The LSTs retracted at 03:00
- "...additional resources would divert resources..." - can you reword to avoid repetition?
Advance on Finschhafen edit
- "Meanwhile, D Company of the 2/17th Infantry Battalion had moved along the track to Sattelberg with the intent of capturing that position. It reported that it was unoccupied, but in fact had captured Jivevenang instead. When the mistake was realised and it attempted to take Sattelberg, it was found to be strongly defended." - a lot of "it"s here that make it hard to track what's going on.
- Meanwhile, D Company of the 2/17th Infantry Battalion had moved along the track to Sattelberg with the intent of capturing that position. D Company reported that Sattelberg was unoccupied, but in fact had captured Jivevenang, not Sattelberg.
- "By evening the Finschhafen was..." - something missing here?
- "...and buried 52 Japanese defenders" - makes it sound like they were buried alive.
- buried the bodies of 52 dead Japanese defenders
Images edit
- File:From the Bumi to Finschhafen.jpg - how does this photo qualify as PD?