Talk:Halo.Bungie.Org/GA1

GA Review

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GA Review

I have decided to put the article on hold until a few minor problems are addressed. Overall the article meets most of the criteria for a good article however there are a few problems which if corrected within 7 days, will get the article to good article level.

Firstly, Halo.Bungie.Org grew to become the most widely-read Halo fansite, receiving more than a half-million page views a day in 2007 needs a reference and i notice it is mentioned further down the article. This information can be challenged and so needs a source to confirm that it gets this amount of hits per day.

Also the article needs to be read through as there are a lot of unnecessary commas and punctuation which means the article doesn't make sense in places and doesn't flow.

Claude Errera and several friends first created bungie.org for developer Bungie's other video games, namely Marathon, in 1998; previous to bungie.org, Errera had been involved in other Bungie-related sites. doesn't need the semi-colon.

Spelling though was good.

26 May 1999 doesn't really need to be linked as it doesn't relate to the article specifically.

Finally, maybe merge sections of the overview with the intro and history as a lot of the content is mentioned already.

However if these are addressed and fixed then it will get its good article rating

Ajpralston1 (talk) 14:17, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

I have broken the aforementioned sentence into two, removing the semi colon, added a citation to the lead and delinked the dates. Can you give examples of other places where there is unnecessary punctuation? --Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs ^(talk) 17:31, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

• The site was started in 1999 as Blam.bungie.org, based no comma needed
• on May 26, 1999 after no comma needed
• Gradually, one staffer dropped out, followed by another shortly after Bungie's acquisition by Microsoft, leaving Errera the sole webmaster and the main force on the site. This sentence needs to be changed

ie Over time one member of staff dropped out followed by another shortly after Bungie's acquisition by Microsoft, leaving Errera the sole webmaster and the main force on the site.

• widely-read Halo fansite; in 2007, it Maybe remove semi-colon and split to 2 sentences

ie. widely-read Halo fansite. In 2007 it...

• contant > constant

It just makes it read better. A comma should really only be used when the reader needs to take a breath or pause during a long sentence. Apart from those examples thats it.

Ajpralston1 (talk) 21:13, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

Made the above fixes. --Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs ^(talk) 17:59, 9 August 2009 (UTC)