Talk:Banksia attenuata/Archive 1

Latest comment: 13 years ago by Cygnis insignis in topic Biara
Archive 1

Good article nomination

Note - yes there are still plenty of articles above but they are just about all fairly specialised. I think I am pretty right for GA, and am still continuing to review and add for FA (which I will go for soonish). Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:29, 29 November 2010 (UTC)

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Banksia attenuata/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sasata (talk) 22:55, 30 November 2010 (UTC)

I've signed up for this review, will have comments up by the end of the week. Sasata (talk) 22:55, 30 November 2010 (UTC)

Comments after 1st readthrough/copyedit: Sasata (talk) 06:39, 5 December 2010 (UTC)

  • no subspecies is mentioned twice in taxonomy
whoops! fixed... Casliber (talk · contribs) 06:57, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
  • "George reviewed the variation in form in the species and felt tree and shrub forms to be similar in their parts" sounds awkward
have a bit of a verbal block there - the gist of it is that apart from one being a tree and the other a shrub, they were otherwise similar in attributes. Casliber (talk · contribs) 07:12, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
  • link/gloss emarginate
glossed Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:46, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
  • "Their arrangement." not a sentence
removed/streamlined 19:46, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
  • what's a "heavy soil"?
one based on a clay - nothing jumps out to link to but I'll have a think about it. added "clay-based" anyway. Coarse or light soils are sandy Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:46, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
Perhaps Soil type for a link, tagged unfortunately.
  • Ecology section feels almost like a wall of text; could use some more pics if there's any available, if not of the Banksia, then maybe some pollinators? Subsections?
I opted for more images as there is awealth to choose from :) Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:17, 6 December 2010 (UTC)
    • planning on returning to the same site during the week for additional shots including bark and tree structure though I sure you'll be able to use some pretty flower pictures to effect. Gnangarra 12:54, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
(mouth watering) oh yeah! Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:36, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
  • "between 15 and 20 C" convert
done Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:36, 5 December 2010 (UTC)
  • "Seedling survival for the species is lower than for banksias which regenerate by seeding over time, but the longevity of mature plants allows for maintenance of population despite poor recruitment until favourable years enable better survival of young plants." something is run-on there
I tried a reword, how's that? Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:17, 6 December 2010 (UTC)
  • "compared with longer intervals the reseeders B. hookeriana and B. priorates." feels like it's missing a word somewhere
added a "for" Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:17, 6 December 2010 (UTC)
  • "Another study on root architecture of Banksia hookeriana, B. menziesii and B. attenuata found the overall structure of all three to be similar, with proteoid mats more active and growing in wetter months (winter-spring), and plants sending out several sinker roots which descend to reach the water table, and the original tap root has often died off." last part sounds awkward (supposed to be connected by "and"?)
reworded. yeah tricky this bit. Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:28, 6 December 2010 (UTC)
  • what are the "Big Bad Banksia Men"?
classic Oz childrens' literature --> Snugglepot and Cuddlepie, now linked. Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:39, 5 December 2010 (UTC)

Looking good, I'll read again carefully later tonight and see if there's anything else I can do to help shove towards FAC. Sasata (talk) 03:35, 6 December 2010 (UTC)

I proofread the refs, hopefully they have pretty consistent formatting now. One thing I'm not sure about: is it "banksia woodland", "Banksia woodland", or "Banksia woodland". The article uses the first, but the refs have a mix of the second and third (and I've probably inadvertently changed some while going through them). You might consider integrating/expanding the single sentence paragraph in "Cultivation and cultural use". Also, most of the pics are of flowers, how about a multiple image stack with early/middle/late flowers for an explicit visual comparison, and fill the new space with pics of the leaves or new growth? Something to think about before the FAC, but until then, the article meets GA criteria, so I'll pass it now. (p.s. fix the dab to Murchison River) Sasata (talk) 17:13, 6 December 2010 (UTC)
I've seen variants in the refs - most consistently "Banksia" capitalised and "woodland" not, in which case having the first in italics (which happens half the time anyway) is more consistent with other usage, so I will conform mentions. Casliber (talk · contribs) 13:36, 7 December 2010 (UTC)

more

same location as before here some more with variety Gnangarra 11:20, 8 December 2010 (UTC)

Biara

  • "Binda, s.—Dryandria, species nova. A species of Dryandria tree.", Moore, Descriptive vocabulary … p. 9, and listed later under "Flowers" with the same definition. (p. 97)
  • Binda: "Banksia nivifolia. There is no such species. Moore states that it has long narrow leaves, in which case it is probably Banksia attenuata R.Br." Aboriginal Names for Plant Species in South-Western Australia by Dr Ian Abbott, quoted Noongar names for plants

Which would be nice to ref, if it was accurate, when I chased this round before I supposed Moore meant B. nivea, "honeypot". Moore (1882 ed.) says,

  • Biara, s.—Banksia nivifolia. The Banksia tree, with long narrow leaves; colonially, honeysuckle, from the hairy, long, cone-shaped flowers, producing abundance of honey, which the natives are fond of regaling upon, either by sucking or soaking the flowers in water. This tree furnishes the best and favourite firewood. Biara Kalla, the dead wood of the Banksia fit for firing.
  • "Banksia, narrow-leaved—Banksia nivifolia—Biara; Pira."

Which accords with this article, he adds

  • Banksia, narrow-leaved, cone of—Birytch; Biytch.

Is it appropriate to add the names for the firewood and cones? Has someone else cited Moore's vocab.? cygnis insignis 14:47, 9 December 2010 (UTC)

Furthermore, the source that transcribes Abbott has "Biara" for B. grandis from Lyon. cygnis insignis 15:53, 9 December 2010 (UTC)