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Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/Clarence Smith Jeffries

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Clarence Smith Jeffries edit

I am nominating this article to be reviewed for A-Class as I believe it meets the criteria. I have greatly expanded this article over the last few weeks, and it was reciently passed as GA. Any and all comments welcome. Thanks, Abraham, B.S. (talk) 05:51, 12 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Support, the article passes the A-class guidelines, in my opinion. I, unfortunately, don't feel that I can leave you comments on the prose. Otherwise, as I said, it passes the A-class guidelines, and from what I can say, this also includes the writing. Perhaps someone else can leave you more useful suggestions in regards to the writing. Good luck! JonCatalán(Talk) 20:21, 15 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Support with comments

  • "Jeffries was born in the Newcastle suburb of Wallsend, New South Wales, on 26 October 1894. The only child of Joshua Jeffries, a colliery manager, and his wife Barbara, née Steel, he attended Dudley Primary School before moving onto Newcastle Collegiate and High schools." I would split up the school part into a separate sentence.
  • What was "the compulsory training scheme." Could we have a bit of explanation or a wikilink. At the moment it is currently assumed that the reader knows what the scheme was.
  • Is meters Australian English?
  • The images should be alternated left to right. I would move the second image of Jeffries to left alignment.
    • Typically, yes, however, as Jeffries is gazing and has his body slightly angled to the left, I believe it was suited better to be alligned to the right. I will leave the image as it is for now, and see what others think. Cheers, Abraham, B.S. (talk) 05:12, 22 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Other than that, looks good. All seems factually accurate, the prose seems good to me, the images are all free, all referenced correctly. Woody (talk) 10:28, 21 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Support, passed this for GA and see no reason not to promote to A-class in our project. Structure, tone, prose, citations and supporting materials are all fine. Minor comments:

  • Prefer not to see "Victoria Cross" repeated in consecutive sentences in intro - perhaps abbrev. to "VC" in the second?
  • Prefer not to see "was to" repeated in three consecutive sentences in Victoria Cross - first two are okay but how about just "Jeffries commanded" in the third one?
  • I share Woody's preference for alternating pics but in this case the direction of the subject's gaze also leads me to go with keeping the second one as is. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 15:14, 22 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page, such as the current discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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