Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Andranik Ozanian/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by GrahamColm 13:48, 31 March 2012 [1].

Andranik Ozanian edit

Nominator(s): Yerevanci (talk) 01:05, 28 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Andranik Ozanian (1865-1927) is considered to be one of the most prominent Armenian military personals of modern times. I think that this article deserves to be featured. --Yerevanci (talk) 01:05, 28 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Not ready, but an excellent start. Some scattershot points:

Parts are far too hagiographic.
Lead is much too short and does not summarize the article.
"Early life" is far too short - if it can't be expanded, it should be merged.
Some chunks are uncited (for example, the second half of the Ottoman Empire section).
Placement of footnotes vis-a-vis punctuation is inconsistent.
Just knowing a bare minimum about the ethno-politics of that region of the world, I'd be surprised if he doesn't have enough detractors that their perspectives warrant mention.
Article relies too much on quotes, and in particular on long blockquotes.
The lists at the end should be incorporated into text (mentions in film and song), split to separate articles (statues), or transwiki'd (quotes about him).

I'd suggest withdrawing and taking it to WP:PR, then WP:GAN. Good luck! Steve Smith (talk) 04:17, 28 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Well, thanks for the review. I agree with most your points, but I have some questions.

Parts are far too hagiographic. Do you mean that the article is too focused on him??

Placement of footnotes vis-a-vis punctuation is inconsistent. Are you referring to the notes or just references in general??

The lists at the end should be incorporated into text (mentions in film and song), split to separate articles (statues), or transwiki'd (quotes about him). Do you mean that the statues part should be made into a new article (e.g. List of statues of Andranik Ozanian) and the films/songs should be merged??--Yerevanci (talk) 05:44, 28 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose. You're doing a good job, but you're in the wrong place; the article was assessed as not meeting Milhist's B-class criteria, and you're going to need a lot of help with the prose ... but not yet. The people who watch the military history articles at WP:GAN don't in general require that articles go through WP:PR first, so if you like, you could put it up both places at the same time ... you'll get a lot of helpful feedback. - Dank (push to talk) 13:56, 28 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.