User talk:Thechillbus/sandbox

Latest comment: 6 years ago by Caldert

Hey Michael & MJ! Your article was thorough and a true pleasure to read. I generally have very little to critique, however… Try to steer clear of any subjective language, and make sure to cite everything. You do this when you refer to the poles at S’Gang Gwaay, and state that many are celebrated as great works of art. Who celebrates them? Who said this? As well, I would have liked to read more about what the people of S’Gang Gwaay were up to while they were living there. If you found information on the families/clans that were living there, you could pop that information in. Lastly, the final sentence of the article appears to be unfinished - “The site remains home to a number…” - be sure to do a full proof read and finish that off. Otherwise, I thought your division into clear sections and language were concise and effective. Hawaa for your grape work guys!Sydney.mcinnis (talk) 22:47, 17 September 2017 (UTC)Reply


Hey guys – yep, grape stuff :) -Just wanted to suggest standardizing the reference of S'G̱ang Gwaay vs. Ninstints. -I also left a number of comments throughout the text, which are viewable in the edit mode – particularly in the section about early trade relations (it does come across as being a bit overly detail-focused in comparison with the rest of the article). -ditto what Sidney said about the abrupt end -the citing of MacDonald is done just a bit too much; you could probably just cite him at the end of the paragraph if the narrative is just coming from him and if it's pretty uncontroversial stuff. Also page numbers or sections helps out, given the general nature of the book's title. Also, the 6th citation in the reference section is a bit messy :O

(Caldert (talk) 04:18, 18 September 2017 (UTC))Reply