User talk:Sophiaweltman/sandbox

Latest comment: 7 years ago by California1990 in topic Comments from Garrison

Peer Review 1: Super interesting topic, I think the breakdown and sub-headings you all have are really good! I think the structure of this wiki article is very strong and you have really good sub-topics to build off of, I do think that the intro could possibly include what a land trust is and what that entails for more clarification. Other than that I think you all have a great structure to the wiki and I'm super excited to read the whole article! - Amanina Shofry, peer editing, 3.10.12017

Response: Thank you for the review! We agree and will include the definition of a land trust in the future. Rebfarhi (talk) 23:28, 15 March 2017 (UTC)Reply

Peer Review 2: The structure for this article looks really strong. I do think it would be interesting to add more sub-sections, such as sections that encompass how land trusts are made, when/why they are enacted in certain areas, more contemporary issues with land trusts, etc. I really look forward to reading this!! The points you're planning to write about are very engaging and need more exposure so hopefully this article will be well-read!--Ashlyn Sloane, peer editing, 3/11/17

Response: Thanks a lot. Including sections that cover how, when, where and why land trusts are made are important topics that we will look to cover. Rebfarhi (talk) 23:28, 15 March 2017 (UTC)Reply

Peer Review 3: I really like how you laid out everything. Seems very organized. Maybe expanding more on the land trust in Santa Cruz, I know this is a bit early but it looks great. The first paragraph looks clear and concise. The topic is relevant as well and interesting as many indvidiuals do not know about land trusts especially one that is happening here in the bay area.

Response: Thank you for the input as we continue expanding the topic. Rebfarhi (talk) 23:28, 15 March 2017 (UTC)Reply

Mick.romero (talk) 01:23, 11 March 2017 (UTC)Reply


Great article and breakdown by subsection! When talking about disputes over Native American Land, should be interesting to see which sources are available to pull from. Also interested in learning more about how regulations potentially fall short and are not enforced as they should be. 50.156.33.28 (talk) 06:25, 11 March 2017 (UTC)Reply

Response: Glad you're interested! You are right, finding sources will be a stretch, especially those written by Natives themselves, but we will definitely be critical about everything we read and of the efficiency of all related regulations. Thank you! Rebfarhi (talk) 23:28, 15 March 2017 (UTC)Reply

Comments from Garrison

edit

• Overall, a great job so far! I read the following sections on the Indian Reservation page: Disputes over land sovereignty, and Colonial and early US history. Let me know if you’ve added other sections to the page, or if there are other sections that you have edited heavily.

• Do one more read through to copy edit. While the tone is good and the writing is high quality, there are still some minor grammatical errors to be fixed.

• Are there any photos or maps you could add as visual aids to your sections?

• You’ve done a good job with citations and with linking to other articles.

• There’s a box at the end of the land disputes section saying that it is a sandbox – this should be removed now.

• Keep up the good work! California1990 (talk) 20:38, 5 April 2017 (UTC)Reply