User talk:Mbrooke2997/sandbox

Peer Review

Hey, I'm editing your article draft! Overall I think that draft looks really really well done. Some notes... A growing ethical and moral concern... is that increasing problems it allows for cyberbullying and violence. - This sentence is a bit confusing to me, maybe rephrase? The app Secret, got shut down due to its escalated use of cyberbullying - no comma needed after Secret Maybe add some more information about how anonymous media sources are used politically, and provide an example. Great work!!! I think the main thing to work on is to check the grammar used in some of your sentences. Emilymorse22 (talk) 16:43, 27 March 2017 (UTC)

(I moved Emily's comments over here so both our feedback would be in the same place! --Jmstew2 (talk) 03:33, 4 April 2017 (UTC))

Instructor Comments

Nice additions! This is looking really good. I agree with Emily that your edits are in need of some general sentence-level copyediting, particularly with regards to punctuation, but content-wise your proposed changes look great. A few things:

1. In your first paragraph, remove the first sentence, since it is redundant with the one before it: "A growing ethical and moral concern regarding these anonymous social media websites is that increasing problems it allows for cyberbullying and violence. For example, the app Secret"

2. Your second addition (in the second paragraph) of the controversy section should come at the end of that paragraph. As it stands, it interrupts related sentences. It will still sound appropriate at the end.

3.[While the app, Secret, has been criticized countless times for its involvement in helping to promote cyberbullying, what most non-users don't realize is that the app encrypts its posts. Secret users must provide a phone number or email when signing up for the service, and When a person signs up for Secret one is forced to put in his or her own phone number or email and when one posts, their information is encrypted into their posts.[5] This can help prevent problems such as cyberbullying, since the app contains a future problem from occurring because if something bad were bound to happen then the app itself would have a way to track down the poster.]

4. In the last section to which you add changes, include this: "For example, An app called Memo..."

5. Finally, I am a bit confused with the jump from anonymous social media platforms to anonymous sources in regards to President Trump. Anonymous sources have been a practice in journalism for a long time, and are not really related to anonymous social networking sites except in so far as they both include anonymity. I would remove this section or edit it significantly. We can discuss it more at our meeting!