User talk:Marcmatossian/sandbox

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Marcmatossian in topic Response to Peer Review

Marc's Peer Review

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When you say "some researchers have compared the need for ...", you are referencing an unnamed group in "some researchers." If possible try to specify who this group is and/or consists of.

In the article under the "Medical uses" section, research for next generation HPV products is referenced. If possible, maybe look into some current research that is taking place and what it could potentially mean for HPV vaccination and prevention going forward.

The "History Section" is the fourth heading in the article. Perhaps this should be moved to an earlier section of the article, so readers can read about the history of HPV vaccine before everything else.

The table for the state-by-state legislation is still missing a lot of states such as California and Washington to name a couple. If you could fill that in that for as many states as you could find that could be helpful to make the article better.

There is an section titled "Insurance Companies" and it contains only sentence but has three different citations. I think a lot could be added here as to why insurers oppose covering vaccinations.

While there is work that you could still do to improve the article, I think you're off to a good start and on the right track to fixing the article. Vaccines can be a controversial topic, but you do a good job of remaining impartial and neutral in your edits. I think something you should definitely focus on is trying to add in as much as you can in the "state-by-state" section because so many states are missing and I think this information should not be too difficult to find. Also, if you could find information about specific insurance companies and their standpoint on HPV vaccinations this could be good too.

Response to Peer Review

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I will look into adding to the sections about the state-by-state legislation, and possibly filling in the missing states. I think with a topic such as vaccine implementation, the ethics behind need for vaccination are directly influenced by the efficiency and manner in which they are rolled out.

In the sources I use, I will be more specific in referencing which group or researchers are stating a point, in order to clarify to the reader.

I had previously not considered adding to the insurance companies section due to a lack of research, and possibly transparency, on behalf of insurance companies wanting to reveal their cost/benefit and roll out methods of the vaccine. I agree, this would be an additional interesting part of the overall debate of HPV Vaccines, and I will attempt to shift my reference search towards insurance companies to potentially add to this section. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Marcmatossian (talkcontribs) 05:18, 9 April 2019 (UTC)Reply