User talk:Krupin.1/sandbox
Latest comment: 9 years ago by Kowalski.118 in topic 2nd Draft
Great Start! A few notes:
- Neutrality: Watch out for it! Be very careful in how you word things
- Incorporate more of the existing article into yours where possible
- Photos: Great opportunities for photos here
- Really like that you've used the Dispatch. Explore a few more sources!
- Old History: there is the potential to find a lot of information about places if you use WayBackMachine. Its a archive of websites. We'll discuss in class on 11/20
Great work! Keep it up!
Instructor Comments No. 2
editWell-written
edit- Good work on the writing, but go back and copy edit.
- Think carefully about the structuring of the article. I feel like that needs work.
Verifiable with no original research
edit- Well cited, and good work on that.
Broad in its coverage
edit- Appropriately broad, although the info about COTA in transportation isn't really needed. Outline the bus routes (make them sub-heads)
Neutral
edit- Good work.
Stable
edit- No Comments.
Illustrated
edit- Good work on incorporating photos, but I'd get as many out of the gallery and into the article main space as possible.
Kenitzer.1 (talk) 15:15, 4 December 2014 (UTC)
- I like how you described history of Woodland park with articles from newspaper. Makes it interesting!
- Transportation: I hope to see more about transportation modes other than COTA.
- How about office/commercial/industrial of the region? Would you mention any of those?
- I like you included religion in your article. It gives extra illustration of residential :)
- I like you were able to get information from various reliable sources!
- Good job!! :)
--Eunjee.son.151 (talk) 16:37, 4 December 2014 (UTC)
2nd Draft
editNotes from the class editor: I would consider restructuring the article, for example taking Landmarks out of the history section and giving that its own section. I agree with Zach, in that you need to keep neutrality in mind; you should use less quotes describing the community as vibrant and whatnot, you're not trying to get people to move there, just give them the facts. Kowalski.118 (talk) 13:51, 9 December 2014 (UTC)