User talk:Kevin duffy9/sandbox

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Kpatel1214

Peer Review 1

The tone of your article appears to be quite neutral and informative. Your outline and lead section also seem to be quite detailed as they show that you have clearly planned out which topics you want to include in the article. One thing I noticed was that you seem to have a list of your sources, but you have not added the internal citations yet. I think that it would be easier to add your internal citations as you draft your article because if you wait till the end, then it might be difficult to figure out the specific source that each fact came from. I would also suggest adding more information to the "Early Life/Family" section. You could potentially combine it with her early education information if you do not discover any specific details about her childhood. Also, there appears to be a typo in the "Early Life/Family" section, where a sentence repeats the word "She" twice.Kpatel1214 (talk) 21:56, 17 March 2017 (UTC)Reply