Hey! I really like your topic... I had never even heard of this, so I'll be doing more research on it! I think you're going in the right direction, but I think you need to be more neutral when writing about this. I understand your anger and frustration with the case, but it's coming off as very opinionated. State more facts. You could probably do this by getting more sources and stating your fact then citing where you got that information from. I didn't actually see any citations in your contribution draft...did I possibly overlook them? But, other than that it's good! Good information and very intriguing!
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