User talk:Godsy/Coinage of Justinian II

Latest comment: 6 years ago by AMcClanan

From Prof. Mc: You've done a good job so far of laying out the key differences in the two reigns' coinages, thank you! Here are a few points to consider as you revise:

  • the main essay written on the topic is still omitted. I've mentioned this lacuna in my feedback twice I believe already, and if you're not sure how to track it down you need to contact me. Without a doubt it's referenced in the two items you do cite. Overall your research could be fleshed out a bit more, but the main omission, and it is a glaring one, is the Breckenridge piece
  • any images you could use? It looks like there are a few already in Wikimedia commons that you could pull over
  • another finishing touch will be expanding your use of links to other Wikipedia entries, including "Justinian II," etc.
  • As you flesh out your research a little, make sure to also wordsmith to make your meaning, such as in the sentence "The style..."

You've got most of the work done, and please touch base if you have any questions as you revise. AMcClanan (talk) 16:55, 25 November 2017 (UTC)AMcClananReply

Peer Review

edit

Hello, I'll be peer reviewing your article on the coinage of Justinian II. I see you're creating an article from scratch, which is daunting, and surely leaves a lot of room for mistakes and new things to learn. The first thing I noticed was that your sections are structured very well and they flow in a coherent and easy-to-understand manner. That's an important thing to consider and difficult to do well. One problem that stood out, however, was the section on 'The coinage of Justinian II'; it seemed out of place. I assume this is meant to function as the 'lead' of the article, coming before the content section, so you may want to double check that. The language in that section as well could flow a bit more succinctly, for example, it could read something like: "The coinage of Justinian II introduced features into imperial Byzantine currency that would become the standard for the Byzantine Empire. Prominent features including the bust of Christ, as well as the depiction of the Emperor solidified the Byzantine art form in these coins.".

I also noticed a few consistency issues, namely: 1., Justinian sometimes occurs without numeral II, (make sure it's the same guy!) 2., some comma and quote spacing issues in a few areas throughout each section, 3., some repeat instances of 'the', such as "still showed the distinct the pointed face of the emperor", 4., double check placement of citations, some appear in the middle of sentences, which I believe the convention would be at the end of a statement that requires citing a source.

Other things to consider would be to take a few minutes to read some parts out loud to see if they make sense as factual statements during your revision. One that stands out to me are phrases like "The style of Christ as imagery of the coins, something stopped during the reign of Leontios, was brought back". It could read a bit more smoothly, perhaps like "The use of the image of Christ in these coins, which were removed during the reign of Leontios, were reintroduced". Little changes like that might help the flow of your text.

Hopefully these things will help along with your revision, and I hope nothing I said came off as harsh! You did a great job on this article, it's just the little things that add up and are sometimes hard to notice when you're working on the same thing for too long.

-Cameron Gendreau