User talk:FranklinLu/Sexual repression

Latest comment: 2 years ago by Sgraney

As Wikipedia recommends, I will be reviewing you based on 5 main categories: 1. A lead section that's easy to understand 2. A clear Structure 3. Balanced Coverage 4. Neutral Content 5. Reliable Sources

1. A lead section: It seems there isn't any lead section? You provide solid information but perhaps it's worth writing a section that introduces the topic of sexual repression for specific countries. I would explain why these are the selected countries. You explain this in each induvial section though it seems wiki articles are typically formatted with an overarching section introduction.

I think it would be best if you include an introduction that is scalable. Meaning, don't include country specifics in your introduction. This way, you can keep your individual country explanations, and anyone can add on to your article with fitting countries.

2. A clear Structure Your structure is great overall, though I am a bit confused on why the "China" section has its own subsection called "Sexual Revolution". It seems that you also address Russia's sexual revolution though it isn't part of a subsection.

3. Balanced Coverage Your coverage is relatively balanced, though Japan's sexual revolution or LGBTQ communities are not touched on like the other two main sections. Maybe it's a good idea to have subsections "LGBTQ Communities" and "Sexual Revolution" in the Russia and China Sections and something like "Sex Dissatisfaction" for Japan

4. Neutral Content Other then Japan's section being a bit on the light side, your content seems unbiased and neutral. :)

5. Reliable Sources Some of your sources seem unreliable 1. "The conversations" - Seems to be a journalist site where anyone can sign up for and post. The author seems credible though I would be careful using the site as a Wikipedia source. 2. "The Geopolitics of Russian Sexuality" - This is a blog spot from a seemingly random dude with 43 followers on the internet, this one is a bit sus. 3. You use a few news sources and though they are credible, they may be pushing bias information so just be careful on quoting their claims directly. I would fact check them if you are citing them for crucial information.

Personal Comments: While I agree the LGBT community plays a large role in a country's sexual repression, I don't think the article explains the connection well and may confuse readers who aren't as familiar with the topic. I think answering "Why are laws restricting LGBTQ communities considered sexual repression?" would be an easy and impactful addition to the "Same-Sex Sexual Activity" section.

Sgraney (talk) 00:08, 17 November 2021 (UTC)Sean GraneyReply