User talk:Eerisman/sandbox

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Lbaumgartner928

Hi Eerisman! Your article draft is looking great so far! It is very well written and sounds accurate for wikipedia. I like how you specifically refer to those who did research on compulsory heterosexuality and integrate their quotes into your sentences. Your sentences flow nicely and all info makes sense in it's particular section. It is great how you are bringing in different viewpoints from authors who are not mentioned in the current article. The evolutionary and religion aspect is very interesting and will definitely benefit the article. Your sentence structure and organization sure does stand out, I hope to make mine flow as great as yours. Overall, nice work!

A few suggestion for edits: For the religion section- consider adding the effect of that implication, this section seems to focus more on what the implication is. In the evolutionary section, you talk about the effects it has on masculinity. Consider adding the effects on women if you can find a good source. You mentioned issues with the current article's structure, do you still plan on editing those? Or have you moved away from that idea? - Bridgetclu (talk) 21:54, 14 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hi Emily : obviously you're already done with the project, but I wanted to tell you it's good. I think it's a great idea and everything you've written down is really concrete. My only suggestion would be to perhaps expand the religion section a bit with examples from Buddhism and Hinduism, as well as the marital customs we have. Good job! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Lbaumgartner928 (talkcontribs) 01:26, 5 November 2016 (UTC)Reply