User talk:Ashleydavidsongwu/sandbox

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Sydneycurrie5

I really like the topic your expanding on, however, i think it would be beneficial to gain more sources. Overall you do a really good job of not taking stance or angle on the topic and being fact driven. I think there are minor changes like changing one word to "factually". Other than that, good job!


I think this topic is very interesting and beneficial. I also liked how you started broad and got more specific. However, I definitely think that you need a few more sources. In addition, I also think it would be beneficial to expand more on and explain the people you mentioned in your summary. Overall I really like this topic and think you did a great job! Isabelleshegog (talk) 19:44, 30 March 2019 (UTC)IsabelleReply

I like how you started the paragraph with a certain time period. This allows the audience to get a background on what the Wikipedia page will be about. I would expand on how women of color are affected on television, news media, and movies. This will allow the audience to compare how men are affected and how different it is from how women are affected in media. Good job! Fariha34 (talk) 03:41, 31 March 2019 (UTC)Reply

The paragraph is great, I think you can find more references and resources to expand more on this topic.Koko413 (talk) 15:44, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Hi Ashley, I liked the topic that you chose, but generally speaking, I think you need to add more information and details. You should explore and explain the plot of the movie as well as give examples from the movie of how men "are depicted as rapists and criminals". As a consequence of adding more information, you will get more citations, which I think is missing a little bit. Good work!!Rafamatalon1234 (talk) 15:51, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Interesting topic of discussion, I would like to see more written about this topic on this page, because I seriously think this is talking about issues that are currently ongoing in our world.Charlier118 (talk) 15:58, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Who directed "Birth of a Nation?" Is it just a film or movie? Make sure you include a little context of this in your first sentence. It's good that you linked the title to a Wikipedia article, but it's still good to have a little bit of context inyour own writing. I would also make sure you don't repeat "this ___" so much. Switch it up, and don't be afraid to combine sentences! Overall, nice work though! Isamouse79 (talk) 16:01, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

I feel like there is much more on this topic that you haven't covered. There are so much more to talk about and I would suggest you expand upon this topic more.--Jasonkung22 (talk) 16:07, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Jasonkung22 I think this topic attract me a lot. It will be better if you could add more content in it.Samuelzhao000005 (talk) 16:38, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Samuelzhao000005 What you have right now is good. You have citations and hyperlinks and a good start to an article. You just need to expand on the article with the same level of care shown here.SocksOfDeath (talk) 16:27, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

I would like to know more information on your topic. You can use more citations to cover more parts of your topic. ChristalCao (talk) 16:32, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Great work! I would just add more sources and maybe some examples after this sentence: This depiction has become a stereotype for black men in television, news media, and movies ever since.Lorenaramirezl (talk) 01:19, 6 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Good job! I think it would be helpful if you used more sources and cited more! Also, give more background/context to "Birth of a Nation" Sydneycurrie5 (talk) 20:22, 7 April 2019 (UTC)Reply