User talk:16912 Rhiannon/Alex Castellanos

Comments

Here are some comments about the review of the article:

1. Intro is much cleaner, up-to-date and you're right, doesn't need citations if the information is covered in the body of the article.
2. Personal life - neither of the [1][2] PBS sources provide the information about his birth.
3. Personal life - the uncited information about his parents/family was removed. Is that because there was no reliable source of information?
4. Personal life - university information from Harvard [4](and other personal information) looks to be a copy from the Wikipedia article, or vice versa. I cannot access the Nexis information [3].

If you can synch up the sources to the information throughout the article - and question information that is worded exactly like the current article, I'd be very happy to come back for another look. For instance, it would be better to get another source for the http://www.iop.harvard.edu/alex-castellanos supplied information since it may be a copy of the Wikipedia article, which means it wouldn't be a secondary source.

Where you're looking to go, though, is very good: 1) all information cited, 2) information grouped into sections more logically, etc.!--CaroleHenson (talk) 19:33, 18 June 2013 (UTC)

Hi Carole, I've reviewed your feedback closely and wanted to discuss a few things with you before I made any changes to my draft. I'll put my replies in the same order as your feedback.

1. Thanks!
2. The two PBS sources do actually support Castellanos' year and location of birth, as well as his immigration to the United States. The first PBS source says: Alejandro (Alex) Castellanos was born in Havana, Cuba in 1954. Six years later his family fled the Castro regime, coming to America with a single suitcase and just eleven dollars. The second PBS source is broken over several pages and page two includes the following: We came over here from Havana, Cuba. My parents came over here with, my parents came over here with $11 and one suitcase, two kids. If you think it would be best to use a source that confirms the date he came to the U.S. is 1961, the National Journal source, currently in use in the article can be added to the section. Would you like me to add this source? Also, if you don't have access to Highbeam the source says: Castellanos, whose family fled Cuba in 1961, is admired by advertising professionals and deplored by political adversaries for his aggressive ads.
3. You are correct. I wasn't able to find a source to support the names of his family members and where he grew up. As you can see though, one of the PBS sources includes the anecdote about his parents coming to the U.S. with only eleven dollars. I had left this out because it seemed unimportant to the article as a whole, but it could be added in. Would you like to see it added to my draft?
4. I've done some digging in the history of the current article and I found this edit from October 2008 where you can see someone added in the text of the Harvard bio nearly verbatim. It seems likely that Castellanos' biography had been published to the Harvard website before this point, as his his fall fellowship was announced in this release in June and would have already been underway by late October. It seems likely that what's in the Wikipedia article was copied from the Harvard bio, not the other way around, but if you are still concerned about the origins of the Harvard bio I will have to look again to see if there's another source for Castellanos' National Merit and Morehead scholarships, as I have been unable so far to find a different source that supports this information. However, I think that the Harvard source is still valid to support his 2008 fellowship, which is mentioned in the Other activities section.

I think that answers all of your specific comments. I have a quick question about your comment: "If you can synch up the sources to the information throughout the article..." Are you asking for me to do something specific with where my citations are placed, or was this in reference to the confusion over the PBS sources?

Thanks again for taking the time to review my draft. Thanks, 16912 Rhiannon (Talk · COI) 19:19, 19 June 2013 (UTC)

Hi! Hope you're having a good day!

1. You're welcome,
2. My mistake, I don't remember seeing the 1st link at all (so I must have kept clicking on the 2nd) and didn't see/go to the 2nd page of the 2nd citation. My mistake! Thanks for clearing that up.
3. Nope, I don't think it needs to go in. I just wondered.
4. Nope, I think we can use the Harvard bio, based upon your analysis of the timing. It just needs to be paraphrased. Update: sorry, it was the exact wording that was used in the previous version, not your version. Nothing needs to be paraphrased.--CaroleHenson (talk) 23:39, 19 June 2013 (UTC)

Thanks so much for responding, I'll keep reviewing the rest of the article. Great job!--CaroleHenson (talk) 23:01, 19 June 2013 (UTC)

The quality of the content - prose, proper sourcing, objectivity - is so good that I moved it to article space (it's so much better than what has been there). I have made some minor tweaks and added a few citation needed tags where I couldn't find all the information. Do you mind checking me, in case I missed something? The one thing I cannot check though, are the Nexis articles.--CaroleHenson (talk) 00:54, 20 June 2013 (UTC)

Finished edits

I've finished the edits, which in a couple of cases involved finding a better source of information. There are a couple remaining places where there are citation needed tags, but that's it.

I found back-up citations for some of the Nexis citations (all but one, I think, that dealt his personal life and having been a philosophy major), so I'm cool about that. I realize that I didn't cover all the material with the back-up citations, but enough key points that I've got a level of comfort.

If you want to take a look at the sum total of all the changes to the Alex Castellanos article, look here.

Thanks so much, excellent work! It's so much better!--CaroleHenson (talk) 02:47, 20 June 2013 (UTC)

Wow, thanks so much Carole! This is fantastic! I've been looking at where there's the citation needed tags so that we can get those resolved:

1. For the year of Guy Millner's campaign, I've found a journal article that mentions the campaign and Castellanos and confirms that it was 1994. I'll provide the details below. Also my apologies, I realize that there's a typo in his name that I copied across from the Salon source, but it should of course be Guy Millner, could you fix that for me?

For Guy Millner's 1994 campaign:<ref name=Fullinwider>{{cite journal |last1=Fullinwider |first1=Robert |last2= |first2= |year=2013 |title=Are negatives positive? |journal=Philosophy & Public Policy Quarterly |volume=31 |issue=1 |pages= |publisher=Institute for Philosophy and Public Policy George Mason University |doi= |url=http://journals.gmu.edu/PPPQ/article/view/188 |accessdate=20 June 2013}}</ref>

2. For Purple's clients the citation number 19, the Politico article Mitt Romney Consultant Wars from my draft supports that BP is a client (it's at the top of page 3 of the article), where it says "The telegenic Castellanos built a profile as a CNN commentator and a lucrative corporate practice: the tarnished oil company BP turned to his Purple Strategies to rebuild its image after the Gulf oil spill." I could have sworn PhRMA was in the other source I'd included there but I don't see it when I look back, sorry about that! I have this Washington Post source that should work. Here's the citation templates for both to drop them in:

For BP:<ref name=BenSmith>{{cite news |title=Mitt Romney Consultant wars: Stuart Stevens, Alex Castellanos, Mike Murphy |author=Ben Smith |url=http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1211/70734.html |work=[[Politico]] |date=21 December 2011 |accessdate=5 April 2013}}</ref>

For PhRMA:<ref name=Franke-Ruta>{{cite news |title=Washington PR firms cashing in on BP spill |author=Garance Franke-Ruta |url=http://voices.washingtonpost.com/44/2010/06/washington-cashes-in-on-bp-spi.html |work=[[The Washington Post]] |date=4 June 2010 |accessdate=20 June 2013}}</ref>

Thanks again so much for helping me with this, I really appreciate it! 16912 Rhiannon (Talk · COI) 12:55, 20 June 2013 (UTC)

 Done My pleasure! Thanks for doing such a great, thorough job!--CaroleHenson (talk) 17:21, 20 June 2013 (UTC)